Great point about the fear of BFing, too, BW. I know I have the benefit of hindsight in both birthing and BFing, and I wonder if it meant I trusted my body more than someone having an AC baby as their first baby.

I also saw that BG talked about being in control with a c/s. I guess I feel differently there too - everything up to then was so scientific that I knew the date of conception, the 'stage' my embryo was in before transfer, the exact HCG and P4 levels, that I really wanted my unborn child to decide when it was ready to come. Of course it doesn't always work out that way, in fact Charlie was in distress because the cord was wrapped around his neck and my labour was augmented, so in the end, he didn't really get to choose his birthdate, my Dr and I chose it for him. But I was in labour already at that time, and I birthed him vaginally despite my Dr pressing me to have a c/s.

I guess it's because I also personally feel far less in control having someone cut me, and then direct how my baby will be born, than if I push the baby out on my own. For me, a c/s was a loss of control - a very scary loss of control, in fact. With my VB, I felt like the one in control, and the birth was about me and the baby, and not a room full of people operating on me.

I guess that's why it confuses me. It's so black and white to me - and before anyone says anything, I understand not everyone thinks the same way. But a VB to me was 1) definitely safer, 2) made me feel more in control, 3) allowed my child to choose when it was ready to come and 4) excluded from the process a whole bunch of people who were not connected to the baby the same way I was. So as an anxious IVFer who had tried for so long to have a baby, all those things meant an incredible amount to me, and made my choice a no-brainer.

Just going back to BFing, I actually never noticed a direct positive correlation between IVF mums and FFing, but I believe, like you say, that it must exist, and I just missed it. It's interesting, and does confirm in part my belief that IVFers, in particular, must lose trust in their bodies in general.

It makes one wonder what can be done to help LTers learn to let go of this distorted view of themselves. Any suggestions?