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But I am amazed at the amount of people who feel its their right to tell DH and I that we are ruining the surprise.
It astonishes me to realise just how entitled people feel to be as intrusive and rude as they like when it comes to pregnancy. We seem to have a distinct lack of emphasis on the social mores to do with being polite and considerate with pregnant women, and it is irritating me more this time than any other. Perhaps I'm just a grumpy old pregnant woman! I suspect that many people find that the pregnancy of another person brings unbidden to the surface many of their own unresolved feelings, and they project a lot of their expectations, fears and insecurities on the woman (or couple) without really understanding what they are doing. It's more about them than it is about you.

That insight has given me some comfort when I've felt like ramming my building pass down some stupid clod's throat at work who has made some bizarre and tactless comment.

In the end, it is up to you. The surprise may be important, it may not. What's important is to consider what your response may be to news of any sort, whatever you decide. If it's gender news you are not expecting, you may have to give yourself permission to feel a bit disappointed, and not feel guilt over that. We didn't decide until we were actually in the office and the tech asked... and I didn't think I cared, but in reality it hit me like a ton of bricks and I'm very glad I found out, to give me time to get used to the idea of a boy after five girls, rather than waiting until delivery.

Dh and I were divided on whether to find out or not - I felt that I needed to find out, though I wasn't quite sure why, and he was adamant he didn't want to know. I knew I'd never be able to keep it a secret, and he went with what I wanted, which was very sweet. Now he's glad he knows. Each couple is different. Each pregnancy is different. Each mother is different.

I hope that you get a perfect scan and that whatever you have, your baby is healthy and growing well