Comments on gender

[surprised]

Hi all,

I'm counting on you wise ladies to help me prepare some answers to the inevitable comments we will get. We have just found out we are having another boy, and I already can think of the "oh how sad it's not a girl", or "I wanted you to have a girl", or "not another boy (in the extended family)" etc etc.

We are really happy and are just thankful for another healthy baby. This is our last baby. But these comments do upset me (and we got them with DS1)

I need answers that aren't too rude/confrontational, but that leave no doubt that I don't appreciate the comments.

HELP!

[toomanyshoes]

I think you summed it up perfectly yourself.

"actually we're just thankful we're lucky enough to have another healthy baby joining our family"

[meow]

I quite like that I have "two of the same", so maybe you can say that too?

[NaeNae]

LOL I know what you're talking about, this is our last pregnancy too and we've found out we're having another girl. There is literally NOONE left to carry on DH's family name as his brothers had only girls and the only boy babies are my SIL's so they have their daddies surnames.

SOme of the comments I have had are "its such a shame you 're not having a boy" to which I reply "not really, there is no pressure now to take on the family legacies"

"I hoped this one would be a boy" to which I reply " well it just wasn't meant to be"

I even had an older guy say to me "I hope your next baby will be a boy, every man deserves a son" ... I just said "No its another girl, the men in hubbies family only throw baby girls" (kind of farmer talk with the throwing LOL)

You don't need to say anything really if they ask and you tell them its a boy and your thrilled your DS will have a little mate.

x x x

[alish]

why dont you just tell people youre not finding out the sex??

either that or just say well as long as we have a healthy baby we dont care!

[Curlygirly]

Just give a big smile on and tell everyone that a perfect little baby boy is joining your family and you are all over the moon! I have noticed when you show your happiness and enthusiasm, it can be contageous Making the people who comment usually feel the joy too and keep their opinions to themselves. Congrates.x

[Taurean]

Gosh, I'd be tempted to tell them to, well, ahem-OFF! The gender comments drive me insane too and we aren't even finding out the sex, nor did we last time!!

We have a DD and TBH, both DH and I would actually love another girl but everyone is assuming already that we are desperate for a boy Some have asked if we'll be disappointed if it's another girl and don't seem to believe me when I say we'd actually love another girl. You can't win!

We can see benefits with both sexes and will be thrilled with either so that's what I tell people now unless they gob on about the boy thing then I tell them how much we'd actually love another daughter. Maybe you could try that? Tell them you were actually hoping for another boy so all your dreams have come true It may just shut a few people up.

[Charlotte91]

I don't know why people think that you need at least 1 of each!

Families come in all different make-ups. Some with only boys, some with only girls, some with a mixture.

Congratulations on your precious little boy! xx

(oh sorry, no advice either!) hehe

[Jennifer13]

It's likely we're having another girl and our family is similar to yours, only all girls like Nai!

We just say DD is delighted - she really wanted a sister - and I'm so pleased I'm on familiar territory. LOL

I think there's a nice synergy to having all the same gender (even though we tried for a boy!).

[Fleur]

"I'm just glad it's human. There's those funny genes in DH's family, you know...."

[Charlotte91]

"I'm just glad it's human. There's those funny genes in DH's family, you know...."

I'd love to say this when I have another bub!!

[Lisa]

My poor sister has gone through this so many times as she has 4 boys.
The best thing she has said was "We found out the baby is a boy, which is wonderful as I had my heart set on having another boy and can't imagine being the mum to a girl". It has stopped anyone saying anything negative.

Congratulations on finding out you're having another gorgeous little man!!!

[LuluHB]

"I'm just glad it's human. There's those funny genes in DH's family, you know...."

That is priceless. Love it and yes, I will be stealing it ;-)

How about that you're relieved its another boy cos your DH couldn't deal with another premenstrual woman in the house.

I don't get that (A) people think they actually have a right to comment and (b) people don't get that you might actually just be happy with a beautiful new baby! We are trying for No. 3, and with two girls already the very few people that do know have almost all assumed its because we're desperate for a boy. Nothing could be further from the truth.

[DaintreeDream]

I love that the way my 2 little girls play together, they have that sisterly love that I never had, I couldn't be happier having another girl. I do understand where you are coming from, earlier in my pregnancy when I was 'breaking the news' to everyone I was very over the looks of disappointment and the ohh I'm sorry... umm what are you sorry for exactly? I am not dissappointed at all so I have no idea why you are! It has all calmed down now... I did have a few moments where I mentioned my babies health (none of my babies have been born healthy so I cannot use that line, but it does seem to put it into perspective for them that gender means nothing when you have a sick baby).

sorry no help, just sympathy.

[Phteven]

Maybe you could just burst into hysterical sobbing and wailing (throw in some hair pulling or chest beating for added drama). They will feel so awkward and freaked out that they'll never make another personal comment again.

[TeniBear]

Maybe you could just burst into hysterical sobbing and wailing (throw in some hair pulling or chest beating for added drama). They will feel so awkward and freaked out that they'll never make another personal comment again.

Yeah, go in the complete opposite direction you really want to - like casually say you're giving this one up for adoption and trying immediately for a girl


Sent from my iPhone so forgive the speelung misstacks

[JBM]

well they think i am having another boy. this will be boy number 4. and although i was kinda hoping for a pink one this time. i am so glad that baby is o.k and seems to be strong and healthy. but i am not looking forward to the responses.
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

god luck

[Amaunet]

I'm also having a second boy and have been surprised not to get these comments? I love the suggestions though for anyone stupid enough to make negative comments about my beautiful boy