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Thread: To find out or not to find out?

  1. #1
    Dani_B Guest

    Default To find out or not to find out?

    This is my last bubs I'm going to have and I have considered not finding out the sex because I did with the last two.
    1- they were both boys so I'm a bit superstitious that if I do it will be a boy again
    2- its the last time so I will never be able to get that element of suprise I havent had before.
    BUT
    I'm a very ummm impatient person and I suppose I really do want to find out but am scared of being disappointed in a way.
    What should I do? Should I do what I orginally planned and just walk in a tell them I dont want to know and no amount of whinging are they allowed to tell me...?



    Did you find out with all of your kids????

  2. #2

    Default

    Hi, I found out with my last two and will ask again this time when i have my scan in a few weeks time. I'm no good at waiting and also it will mean i will know which set of clothes to wash.

    I think only you can make up your mind in what to do. A couple of things to think of if it was a girl would you like to know now so you can buy pink things and also if it's another boy will you need time to let it sink in that you are having another boy ?

  3. #3
    Goof Guest

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    Hi,

    I couldn't wait with DS i held out until 32weeks and HAD to find out (terrible isn't!)

    With DD she was going to be my last and i wanted a girl so bad, that i decided i would find out so i had time to get used to the idea if she was going to be a boy. Not that i would've loved her/him any different. I just needed to know.

    I do have some regrets about finding out and not having "The suprise" but with both my children i didn't tell anyone (besides DP) what i was having, so telling everyone what i had and their responses were enough for me.

    If i were you i'd find out but keep it too myself. (if you can)

  4. #4
    Dani_B Guest

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    not very good at doing that...

    Last time with mr no2 I found out and dh and I were the only ones to know and that worked out terribly as dh mistakenly told the skids by saying he's going to be happy or something like that and they jumped on it like oh so we're having a brother. silly man.
    Thats what he wants to do is find out but not tell anyone so I reminded him of what happened and he said I wont do it again but I know I couldnt trust that.
    Maybe go and leave him at work so he cant know??? No I wouldnt be that cruel.

  5. #5

    Join Date
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    This is my first and I never wanted to find out! Had to persuade DH to agree with me!
    With the superstitious thing - well, you either have a boy or a girl right now and finding out will not make an otherwise girl baby turn into a boy IYKWIM?!!!!
    I say delay gratification and hold out for the suprise!

  6. #6

    Join Date
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    I think you need to consider if you're 'hoping' for one sex. Gender disappointment is a common thing and if you're hoping to have a girl after 2 boys and wait for your 'surprise' you may find yourself upset at first if you have a boy OR you could be unbelievably happy either way .

    I didn't wait for a surprise either but that was my first and under different circumstances. But I just couldn't wait LOL!!! All the best and let us know what decision you go with!!

  7. #7

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    I'm not too much help as i've only had the one dd but DH and i have decided that we are both too eager too wait til the birth..and there's the whole prep factor - so we'll prob find out with every one

  8. #8

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    I didn't find out with my first 2. Not for not wanting too, they just couldn't see. I HAD to find out with my 3rd bub, I already had 2 boys and deperately wanted a girl.I had another boy, but finding out early helped me I think. I also found out with my 4th bub, a little girl. Don't think bub's sex is going to change if you find out durig the scan sweety

    Goodluck and I'm sure whatever you do, you will be happy.

  9. #9
    julesr Guest

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    Why don't you take in a piece of paper and an envelope and get the ultrasound operator to write "boy" or "girl" on it and seal it to give it back to you? That way you don't have to make the decision to find out now - you can find out later if you decide you can't stand it anymore. (Make sure the envelope is lined so you can't read it if you hold it up the light LOL!)

    I'd also give the envelope to someone else to mind for you - to make it just that little bit more difficult to find out in case you just have a "moment" of temptation but might regret caving in later? Maybe your best friend or Mum could keep it for you.

    I totally understand your dilemma! I love the "idea" of a surprise but DH and I were way too curious to hold out - and as you would already know, it's a bit of a buzz knowing.

  10. #10

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    With DS I didn't want to know and DH wasn't sure, so we got the gender in a sealed envelope. It sat in the car for 20 weeks and neither of us peaked and we were so glad we didn't. It was so nice to get a surprise at the end! This time we didn't find out either. But also we don't mind what it is so it's probably not quite the same as you. Good luck with your decision.

  11. #11

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    I'm not at that stage yet, but hopefully when I am I will definitely be finding out! I'm too much of a planner and organiser, and very impatient I like the idea of having an envelope with the info though

  12. #12
    allyfield Guest

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    With my first pregnancy we never found out but I had a feeling it was a boy from the beginning and I only had a boys name picked out came little colin this time round I picked a girls name and a boys name and I had a feeling this one was a girl and we are having our little girl in 10 weeks time. At our 20 week scan we weren't sure whether we wanted to know so we got the sonographer to put it in a sealed envelope but that only lasted an hour.

    If I fall pregnant again I will find out, its still a surprise seeing what your new little baby looks like.

    Also i am glad we found out because there are no hand me downs this time as my neice is 10 years old and we have o friends with baby girls so we have to start from fresh but I am having fun buying girls clothes.

  13. #13

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    We haven';t found out with either of ours, and you just sort of get over it I guess. I mean - I can'tfind out now, so I'm not stressed about it anymore.
    I'm thinking its a girl, but who bloody knows Its either a boy or a girl!

  14. #14

    Default

    DH and I aren't finding out, and are happy about that - we want the surprise! DH originally wanted to find out, but when I pointed out about the "surprise" factor on the day he was happy with that. "It's a baby!" isn't a surprise - I mean, after labour you should know you've had a baby!

    But some people don't like the wait - I can understand that, although I'm lucky that my DH wants to wait too now; I couldn't have him know and me not!

  15. #15

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    i didn't find out with either of my 3, but i have this time, although i am keeping it to myself. i found out for practical reasons as bubs is due dec 27th and i have to be organised should it come early, my worst nightmare is going into labour christmas eve, bubs born before santa comes and santa not leaving he/she any pressies.

    But i actually wish i hadn't found out, i like the surprise at the end and now i feel like i've been cheated out of it, but i'm sure that will change when i go shopping for those blue or pink things.

    Taz

  16. #16

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    My DF and i are finding out. I have found out the sex of all my children. As i dont have any girls clothes left from my DD ( she is 8 next week) I will have to start from scratch with her. I have all my DS's clothes so if it is a boy i only have to get a few things. Oh the excitement. I am also to impatient to wait. I need to be prepared.
    I have the "feeling" that this baby is a girl so we will wait and see.
    Also you get the surprise of seeing who bubs looks like when he/she is born.
    Goodluck,
    Jen

  17. #17
    Dani_B Guest

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    WHOOPS!!!! Went today for it and I thought it was a boy and she said do you want to know and I looked at dh and said its definately a boy and left it at that now I want to know and I dont GET to find out until the end... STUPID STUPID STUPID!!! ARGGGHHHHH!!!! I wanted them to write it down but they wrapped it up so quickly that I really couldnt get that in before she said wipe your belly its over. ..

  18. #18

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    Danni I would call them. I am sure they will remember.

    I found out with our first daughter, they told me she was a boy! I just seemed to know it wasn't right but it was a bit of a surprise. With our last 3 children we found out too.
    This time I want to find out on Birth Day. I want to experience the excitement of opening those little legs to see...

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