My DH has the middle name of Allan - which is his grandfather's name who passed away whilst MIL was pregnant.
I agree with the others - honouring someone with a middle name is a good idea. First names can be confusing and might make people sad because they are constantly reminded of the fact that the person isn't with them anymore IYKWIM?
I'm not a fan of Carla (only cos I knew a total biatch with the name) but my physio's name is Carlie and she's really nice
my husbands grandfather passed away 2 weeks before our first childs birth, we made the decission then and there that we would name our baby after him, to us it just felt right
if you were to perhaps use it as a middle name as others have said or adapt a name that may be similar and still hold the significance to you all,
My grandad passed away 3 days before Jazz was born, and her middle name (Ray) is after my grandad (Raymond).
I could never use it as a first name, not only for other people remembering and being sad, but also... its big shoes to fill for your child, 'living up' to their name. Thats why we used it as a middle name, and also changed it a little.
My brother died when DS was in utero so he has Patrick as his middle name. At the time I swore that even if he was a girl the middle name would be Patrick...!
Carlie, Karlie, Kaali, I love all those and were on my girls list.
Is Carlo his full name?
Cathy - as i mentioned in the bellybuddies thread - our baby, had it been a boy, would have been named after DH's dad. although he passed a loong time ago, DH has only recently come to terms with losing his dad and it was me that suggested we use his dad's name for our son. no matter when we have a boy, it's name will be after DH's dad. middle name is after a very good friend of DH's - well, his son - who lost his life in an accident last year. these friends are one set of the Gremlins godparents, and we wanted to honor them and their son....
do what feels right for you - if you don't want Carlo as a first name for a boy, it would be a perfect middle name - and it's more the reason behind it being important to you that matters
I'm so sorry - it's a difficult time to lose a parent, not that there is any easy time. How lovely that you are considering honouring his memory this way.
I think Carlo or Carla or Carl are lovely names, as first or middle.
Very sorry to hear of your loss.
My father whom I adored passed away when I was 5 months PG with my 1st daughter. I found out she was a girl while he was in hospital so he knew before he passed that he was going to have his first grandaughter. This time we`re hoping for a boy and I will honor my father by giving my son his name. Not because Im trying to replace him but I want to acknowledge one of the greatest men I have ever know, My dad.
If we have a girl however I dont think John would fit somehow
CathyS- Im so sorry to hear of ur FIL.
My father died when I was about 6 months pregnant. He had been ill for a few years so I always said if I had a boy, its middle name would be named after him. Jake has now got the middle name Craig after my dad. I do like the name Carlo, but only if it would be in an italian (or half in ur case) family.
I quite like Carla as a first or middle name, personally I would have Carlo as a middle name, if for no other reason than it makes things easier at family gatherings (ie you know which person is being spoken about), but obviously the choice is up to you and your partner.
When I was pregnant with DD, her due date was the same date my grandfather died several years before. Mum hinted that she would like us to consider naming our child for him if it was a boy and was born on the due date, but DH and I really don't like the name Lewis so thankfully we had a girl, and was born two days before her due date - no awkwardness!! (And no, I'm not a fan of Louise either so that was out too!)
The baby I'm carrying now was conceived within a week or so of DH's mother being murdered - I went off the Pill on DD's birthday (the Sunday) and MiL was killed on the following Wednesday. I toyed with the idea of naming this baby for her, leaning more toward a middle name rather than a first name (I think it would just be a bit painful for all our family if we were to give this child her name as a first name), but we mainly decided to stick with our own ideas on names because Briona (my MiL) was technically DH's stepmother (although he has never had any contact with his real mother since she left him and his dad as a baby, he doesn't know to this day whether she's alive or dead, and Bri has been DH's mum since he was 5 so she's all he knew), and DH's half-brother is her biological son so we wanted to leave the option open to him if/when he has children to name his daughter for his beautiful mum.
im sorry to hear about the losses
my baby is going to be named after my stepfathers best friend that passed a while ago
and my sis in law sees spirits and she has seen his in my parents house and i was there on my birthday and she said she saw him getting upset trying to look for me but i was outside in a tent but that made me want to call my son jamie because this is when he was concieved i dont normally believe in that sort of thing but in this case i do because the circumstances of his death would stop him from moving on so yeah
Thanks for your kind words. The funeral was jan 17, but my partner is still finding it hard (being only child and all). We have decided, that the baby will carry his middle name (Carlo) if a boy. I won't find out the sex of the baby til march 13 3d/4d scan (the 19 week scan, baby had crossed legs. I was a little sad about that as Carlo asked what the baby was (even as he was dying :-( ). But Alby says he feels his Dad's spirit around him. I think that is such a blessing. My Mum often says she feels her late Mother around her as well.
JwithJ: That's a nice thing you are doing naming the baby after your Stepfather's best friend.
Gothmum: I'm so sorry to hear about DH's Mother being murdered. I agree, I think it would be painful to name the baby after her. And you leave the option for DH's half brother to name any children after her later on (when the pain is not so fresh).
Last edited by CathyS; January 29th, 2009 at 08:14 AM.
I know this isnt quite the same but my sister passed on 18 years ago and I decided then that if I had a girl I would use her name. fastforward 15 years and I had my girl Carol rose. On another note my sister had a baby the year after and used her middle name. (I was 10 years younger than her she was 20 at the time)
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks