Should i find out the gender?

[PinkPalace]

Thanks Manta, Webbmeg, kell and Tanstar,

Its nice to hear some positive stories about finding out.

Well i asked DD again last night.... Didnt really get an answer. When i asked if he wanted to find out he said 'no' and when i said why? he didnt know why

So i put my case forward and said we would only have to think of 1 name (as we have NOOOOO ideas at all... not even a first name for either a boy or girl)... well i like Alexi for a girl but he says no because dd#1's name also starts with a A.

then he said i could find out and not tell him... but i want to decorate ! lol.... unless i keep the nursery room door shut for 5 months? that could work what a surprise then!

mmmmm

i do agree thought it would have to be both know or no one knows. oh i dont know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAHHHH

[Arimeh]

I've so been where you are honey!!!! My DH was of the opinion that he didn't mind finding out, but would go with whatever decision I made. So you know what I did? I asked all my friends, family, workmates etc what they would do, and made up a little poll to see which side won out, because seriously, it was doing my head in. And the end result - not to find out. By one vote. So that settled it. But then, 6 weeks later, I spotted a piece of paper at work where I had rang up about a 3D scan and realised that I could get it done that week if I wanted to. Out of all the crap sitting on my desk at work, thats the one piece of paper that jumped out at me. So we got the 3D scan done, and STILL didn't find out!!!! pmsl... some things just aren't meant to be..

[PinkPalace]

Gudism
That is what i am thinking maybe go into the scan with no hard decision and if bub's bits present themselves obviously then we were to find out... if not then... surprises in store?

[~Trish~]

Maybe fate will decide for you LOL!

I found out with both of my boys, it really is a surprise no matter when you find out and it in no way takes away the joy and excitement when they finally arrive. I loved knowing what I was having, I felt like I could connect more by giving them names and buying them things.

It is such a personal choice and only you and your DH can make the final decision. Luckily my DH knows how much I hate not knowing things so he didn't argue when I said I want to find out!

[Arimeh]

Yup sounds like a good plan. That way, if you don't expect to be told and you can't find out, no disappointment!! We were a bit disappointed when the sonographer told us that she could "guess" what the sex was... big whoop-de-doo..I can guess too... lol

[Tannis]

We found out with DS because I hate not knowing things and for DP made it seem more real for him. This time round I made the decision not to find out, to see if its a better surprise at the end or just the same at 20wks...I always saw it as its a surprise no matter when you find out. A lot of our family didn't want to know (didn't stop them trying to get it out of me throughout my whole pregnancy though). DP really wanted to find out this time but since he said this is the last baby I stood my ground and said no I want a surprise at the end and as much as its nearly killing me not knowing, the pregnancy has gone really quickly and its fun guessing and hearing what other people think your having.

I agree with either both know or neither, it would be too hard to keep a secret like that...I wouldn't be able to!

GL with you decision!!

[krysalyss]

I can't see how finding out ruins the surprise. Its still a surprise - just a little bit earlier. I think you have so many new things to find out when they are born that it is nice to get one of the surprises earlier on.
We found out the sex of DS at 19 weeks. We also named him at this time. It really helped me bond with him before he was born and I felt like he was just as perfect as perfect when he was finally in my arms and I had spent all of that time with him, already knowing who he was.
Ultimately it is a personal decision but I never regretted knowing the sex.