Well Its offical I am depressed!!
My cervix has NO dialation!!!!!!!!!!!!Well maybe 1cm and is still quite high!
Went to Obst she explained that Obviously baby needs to come out soon.. and she is happy for me to wait a little longer if I want to wait and see if a miracle occurs for natural in next couple of days or wait to see if dialation occurs by Thursday another appointment! And if miracle does happen great! If dialation is ok by thurs great too she will start induction if I want! BUT I cannot be induced now or if no dialation because of risk of uterine rupture from previos c/sec scar! Plus they are not allowed to use the Gel on VBAC's either it intensify's this uterine rupture thingy too so no gel which is what fricken helps to open the cervix!!!!

So I could have option for C/sec tomorrow or anytime really OR end being a c/sec on Friday if nothing happening before then! I thought I could at least have induction but also she thinks babies position at moment isnt really favourable either and even though induction may happen (if dialation miracle) it may ultimately end up c/sec again anyway (50% chance) Argh!

Im so angry and sad all at once I feel my body is failing me!!! Obviously I was in complete tears lucky DH was with me he said to wait till Friday which at first I was like just get it over with its obviously never gonna happen but now Im like Ok wait till Friday then can prep myself for inevitable by then but also have the chance to maybe get a miracle in between now and Friday

So thats my crapy day and all I can think about....Hey we all cant have perfect pregnancy's and in the end it is still way better than my last pregnancy of 2mths in hossy and not being awake for birth! At least this time if is a c/sec I can be awake and cuddle her straight after and recovery will be better than last time as general really knocked me about along with no energy for 2mths in hossy, So there is some positives but Obviously it is still something I really craved being able to push my baby out myself! Oh how I just want to cry now

IF ANYONE HAS ANY IDEAS OR ADVISE IF BEEN THRU THIS BEFORE PLEASE POST ME THANKS IM SURE THIS SHOULD BE IN THE BOOHOO ROOM BUT I POSTED IN HERE!
Kristie