Thanks Sal,
I am the first of my friends to have a baby and so I don't really have anyone I can share this with that will be able to understand or help. I try to explain to DH and he tries to help but to be honest he is so busy trying to finish the painting and please his fathers whims that I really don't have his undivided attention right now and I know that he feels bad about that. We have just left it too late to try and finish everything we needed to and now we are rushing and that is taking time away from our 'us time' that we need right now.
I have a Doula and I called her yesterday and had a chat with her and she was good but she also has little ones that constantly talk to her while she is on the phone with me so I feel bad that I am keeping her from her children. I just wish I had a friend who had recently been through this that I could sit down with face to face and just have a chat with. But thats just not possible. I am looking forward to getting involved in a Mothers Group once the baby is here cause I am worried that these feelings will come back and visit me even after the baby is here because I really don't have anyone to share this with especially when DH goes back to work and I am home alone. I kind of wish they had Pre-Mothers Groups so pregnant women could hang out together over a coffee and just share. I honestly wouldn't know what I would do without my BB girls. They are my only sanity. I feel like I spend most of my life sitting on this forum cause its the only comfort I get right now.