yes he definatley sounds just like my ex.. i just thank God i escaped to australia for some time away from him and everything to do with him. he's basically treated me like an automaton with no emotions, just a vessel carrying his baby, that frankly he has been quite happy to not be involved in the decisions, appointments and purchases that i have had to make to prep for his imminent arrival.. he just seems to think this is some kind of side show that he can come and go from as he pleases. like right now he's not even tried to be in contact with us until his sister told him to (she's the up and coming matriarch of the whanau) as he's got himself a new (very young and blonde and preened - wears red lippy to uni - so ott) gf, who his friends (who are also my friends) have told me they really don't like, without my asking or even bringing her up.. so i figure they must feel pretty strongly that she's not good news. but that's his choice. he made it. he has one chance this friday to make things right and at least apologise, but i don't have any expectations of this happening. i figure is best for bub if his dad is going to be the complete w***** he is proving himself to be, it's best if he walks away now before there is an innocent to disappoint.

oh God. i just realised what a rant this turned into.. i'm so sorry lol! am not usually so totally self involved..

i do hope that you find a good lawyer who will help you protect your beautiful boy. he is all that matters. i'm glad that you have such great support around you! it makes all the difference. just remember that you can lean on your friends, thats what they're there for. you would support them in their time of need so you deserve to be able to seek their support now. and remember that you need to take time out to grieve as well. thats what i've found, that i need time sometimes to just let it out that he's not the person i fell in love with anymore. maybe he never was. it is a loss just the same as any other. he was your other half and now is not, so just give yourself the time to let that out and let it go. it really helps!

i hope you are well, love liv