I guess the moral of the story is to do what makes you happy,
Cherished, perfect.

Mum2Ramone, DH and I went through a stage similar to this. It was horrible. Its more like 2 people living in a house where the only thing you have in common is a child. It was ridiculous because DH and I have oodles of stuff in common. He made the money, I was wholly responsible for spending it (that way if we didnt have enough, it was my fault). Holidays, my decision (that way if it sucked, it was my fault). How to handle the kids, up to me (that way if it didnt work or made them worse, my fault). And here is the kicker, our fights because of this ridiculous situation - its all in my head and if its sucks its because I make all the decisions, so its all my fault.

Dont allow yourself to be sucked into that trap anymore. Dont bother fighting about it anymore either - and I know its hard because the stress of havin to make every last decision and worrying that you might make the wrong one is crippling.

In future make half your decision this. "Its your turn to choose."

My lil sis and I have a stress free way of dealing with the finances and it works well for us. In my family, I get the money, pay all the bills, then hand what is left to DH to buy the food and make it last the fortnight. In hers, her DP gets the money, pays all the bills then hands her whats left to buy the food and make it last the fortnight.

No one person in either family is left with the entire burden, and while it sounds like making that money stretch out seems to be the harder part, its actually heart breaking to look at how much you have and watch it vanish. And it is easier to make it stretch when you don't realise how much you had in the first place. So maybe start involving him in the bill paying. Get him to slowly take responsibility for paying your current financial commitments so that he is involved and you are less burdened.

Don't get drawn into the fight, dont yell. Its like Lu said, talk to him, not at him. Men have "deflector shields" that would make Scottie jealous. If they feel they are about to be blamed for something or made feel guilty, they will turn into myopic jerks and you will be the one left feeling like the bad guy.

FInally, our lives really started to turn around when my DHs XP's sister gave us a copy of The Secret. It was not all the LOA stuff, but the most important message inside the whole show that cherished has already said. You are responsible for your own happiness. When you stop expecting others to make you happy, your life will turn right around. You choose how you react, how you feel and how you will let their words and actions make you feel. No one can make you feel bad, but you can choose to. If you concentrate on making you happy, he might just take some good vibes in and start to turn around himself. ... Or you might find that you would be happier if this was the end of your relationship. Dont be scared of finding that out, it would only be for the best if thats how it goes.

Smile, be brave, be happy in your life and your decisions.