Sorry Fiona if I wasn't very articulate, I have a 2 year old jumping on me lol.
I was just trying to answer your question "D'you think that's fair or d'you think it's just sour grapes on my part."
Yes, I think it is sour grapes, and no I don't think it is fair if you are not communicating the lesson. I know you acknowledge you have issues - and they are what I was referring to. I think the two issues are beng confused and clouding each other.
I apologise if I spoke out of turn.
The thing is with teenagers things change from day to day, their attitude, their behaviour, it's hard to keep up as a parent. Yesterday DS14 was going to a sleepover at his mates house on Friday but because of his attitude this morning he is now no longer going. I suppose what I'm trying to say is sometimes as a parent we say something but the next day it can change. So as Fiona initially told her friend it was up to her about the babysitting things can change in between. I think it's important that you tell your DSD exactly where she stands as far as the babysitting.
You're right Dianne. When I initially said that to my friend, I anticipated rebuilding the trust with DSD quite quickly. Owing to a few other things that have happened, that trust hasn't been rebuilt.
In fairness to me, this is the first time she's been asked to babysit (and she doesn't even know that my friend wanted her to babysit) in three months so with all the other stuff going on (health issues, pregnant, selling house, buying house), it hasn't been top of mind to talk about something that was a hypothetical ie. "IF you get asked to babysit again, you can't." Does that make sense?
ATM, I honestly have limited energy for working through things. I know that I should but my priority is staying sane (not easy given present housebound circumstances and partner working most weekends to boot) and on looking after my health enough to manage to stay out of a wheelchair around the house at least.
DSD has become a much lower priority lately than she has in the last three years.
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