My mum was the one that was too casual and I'm pretty sure that there would have been some people that thought badly of that but she was a product of her upbringing - Mum was pretty rebellious and often her own mum would find out where mum was and come in a taxi and drag her home (nan never drove a car) and that only caused more problems so I guess she took the approach she did with us because she didn't want to repeat the mistakes her mum made, but now HER approach has also influenced the way I feel about it LOL. I was the 'good' kid, but she did have a lot of problems with my sister and brother (the other two brothers were/are fine) and I am not going to repeat that with my kids so I'm taking the middle road LOL and being hard, but fair.
Much the same here. My mum allowed me to do things i wouldn't dream of letting my DD do! And I was ok kind of but she had dramas with my sister. I feel like it's better to set some limits.