I am so sorry you lost your first little boy. I cannot imagine how devastated it must have been to lose a perfectly healthy little baby and so late in your pregnancy. But not too long and you will have your little boy here to hug and to kiss. I have to say that I only started getting better after my first loss when I got pregnant again and I was quite better after she was born. Nine months of nerves in between, but I do not have to explain that to you.
I am in the US, in the Philadelphia suburb, so a whole different time zone :-). I found this site after my first miscarriage and it helped me a lot. I mostly just read other people's posts, but it was nice to know there are so many women with the same experiences. Made me feel less nuts ;-).
I had some problems with b/f too, because DD did not quite know how to latch on. I had one of those electric pumps, and it really helped - I could pump and feed her from the bottle until she learned to take it "from the tap". She eventually learned. The beginnings may be hard, but do not get discouraged. Even if the health benefits of b/f are still being debated, it is really convenient, particularly for those night feedings, so worth it!