coco - I'm speechless. I've had run-ins with my mother but not to that extent. When she left my dad she wanted me to go live with her because I was under 16 and it meant she'd get a single parent pension. I didn't stay long.

You are probably right, she probably does feel guilty about what she did to you and your siblings. And I think that not trusting her with your baby when it arrives is a wise decision. It sounds like she is not the kind of person you can reason with as she is living in her own reality - my mother does too.

I see you have tried to distance yourself from her. Perhaps next time you get pg, don't tell her. Don't contact her. Let her be upset about it when she finds out from someone else and let her come and apologise (can't say I expect that would happen), maybe that will get through to her that you're really hurt by her behaviour and don't want to be involved with it in future.

Wish you luck with her but I reckon reduce contact to reduce your stress. And, if that doesn't work, just come on here and rant about it because getting it out of your system is always a good thing to reduce stress! I'm thinking I'll start blogging to help out there, maybe it would for you? When I write it always calms me down...