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Thread: Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ April 2009

  1. #55

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    Hi everyone, Im back after the trip to Nanny & Poppy's and if any of you are having trouble getting through at the moment Ill tell you this...

    Being away even though it was just to visit relatives, I felt better & better everyday. I narrowed it down to I was not talking about the m/c and everything else to ANYONE. Just hanging out with the grand parents and by myself has done me the world of good. I highly recommend gettin away for a couple of days to anyone having trouble gaining some clarity.

    I got AF late friday night lightly and very heavy saturday so I belive that it bought me alot of closure and clarity aswell. I was feeling obsessed with TTC aswell during the first cycle back and I knew it was VERY slim pickings as to falling pg or not so Im so happy I am back into a proper cycle. I cant belive how much better I feel. I hope that those of you yet to come into a new cycle gain the same as I did. And for those lucky ones who fell pg straight away, you're a freak of nature and Im happy for you

    Hope you're all doing well, I havent gone through all the past posts, I started to but I felt myself getting upset so I might just lurk a little for a while maybe, and on days I feel strong Ill go through everything.



    Lots of love hugs &

  2. #56

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    Coco I am glad you enjoyed the break it sounds like a good idea to get your mind off things maybe hat's what I should try.

    Today I am feeling crappy I came home after only one hour at work and I am going to go to the DR to get checked out I have no bleeding after yesturday but I feel feverish my back pain has returned and I feel like I could sleep for a whole week I have never been so physically and mentally drained I think I need a holiday I hope everyone has a good day i am going to tae a nap b4 my app with Dr.

  3. #57

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    Jen - I don't know much about temping, but I assume a drop in temp means af is on her way? ETA - just saw your next post - that answers my q. Thanks for the no AF vibes...

    plc - thankyou for dropping in. I too read your post and had a bit of a teary moment.

    andy k - hugs hun

    possums - knowledge is power!

    cherished - whilst I didn't have a d&C, I know how consuming ttc is. One lady asked me the other day when we were adding to our family & I said soon hopefully and walked off. I felt like saying quite frankly, it's none of your business, but I didn't cos overall she is a nice lady.

    charm - Sorry, I can't answer your q about the d&C. I hope you are ok & there is no infection or anything like that. Maybe it's just your body wanting you to slow down?

    sally - good on you! it should be all about you. Most people rant because they don't know what to say, so they should just shut it!

    Hannah - sorry to hear the meds are causing disruptive sleep. You probably feel so terrible now cos its been ages since you've had good sleep and it is all catching up with you. Hopefully the dr will be able to prescribe something to help.

    mel - hugs hun. damn it is such an emotional time ttc. why does it have to be so hard?

    Eliza - So glad you are feeling better. Hanging for our holiday in May - seems so far away...

    Boble - Will try to get to the post office today, so you get the Maybe Baby for the weekend.

    AFM - Well I am feeling emotional again. Thank goodness I have a naturopath appointment on Friday b/c I think I need something for my emotional wellbeing. I keep thinking I am out for this month, that if AF is going to show up, just get here already. I hate the tww - it sucks. Why does ttc have to be intense, such a chore? I want to be one of those women who claim to dtd once and be pg. Also, I feel like I am in competition with the mums in my mums group. I know some of them are thinking about #2 and I don't want any of them to announce before me, or at least me be pg when they announce. That is such a horrible thing to say but only 1 knows of my m/c & ttc and I don't want to have to explain to the others anything. I hate feeling like this. It makes me seem like such a cow and then I think maybe me not falling pg is punishment b/c of what I am thinking. arggg!
    Sorry, that was such a negative post. I am off to find some inspiration.

    Hello to everyone else.

  4. #58

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    just popping in ...am so busy at work today I am sorry I don't have time for personals, but I wanted to thank you all for your nice comments and support.

  5. #59

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    Just wanted to pop on before bed.... sorry I didn't get to post today, it's been such a busy day straight from the get-go. Will try to post in the morning before school, but have to be back there first thing to distribute See's candy to the kids that sold it, plus it's a minimum day, plus popcorn, smencils, and now I guess Spring-o-grams! I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut, or simply learn how to say no sometimes! Anyhow, was feeling guilty for not posting so wanted to at least let you know I'm thinking of you all!

  6. #60

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    Hey Jen

    Just had a sticky beak at your chart, have you tested for this month?

    I feel like looking at other peoples charts on forums while Im waiting to ovulate or waiting to test gives me something to be excited about and something to look forward to.

    Im on CD5...Sheer torture... all day i have been quite cranky seeing bloody prams and women who are pregnant but not looking after themselves everywhere! Argh! The holliday was much needed and im prepapred for moving on but im not prepared for the days where I feel like this...frustrated, angry, annoyed and impatient...

  7. #61

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    Hello everyone

    rhichichi I totally hear you on wanting to at least be pg when others you know are announcing that they are! I was totally happy when my clients were all rocking up pg because we hadn't started ttc yet... Then we had started and the women kept rocking in telling me they were pg which I was still excited about because I thought I wouldn't be far behind... Now they are all showing and talking about it all and I have lost this one!!! So yeah I hear you... It would be nice at 'least' be pg to soften the blow!

    ahhh coco you were doing so well with the happinesss thing! I too felt the ups and downs and I'm hoping that I will stay up after my chat with DH today.... we are all here for you

    sally Ikwym about telling people I don't want to talk about them... unfortunantly I am seeing all of these woman at work so I can't be rude... I am good at telling my firends I don't want to talk about them and what they are saying is 'their' experiance and there are thousands of woman having a different experience everyday so I don't want to hear about it

    AMF I had my check up today with the gyno for after the D&C... We were with her for about 30mins and Jen she did that u/s to make sure the lining was all ok. Anyway we had a huge chat with her about the waiting or not waiting to TTC thing... She did say that the only reason to wait is if you are emotionally not ready. Physically your body will not hold the pregnancy (IF you did happen to get pregnant before af) if the lining wasn't thick enough SO you would just have a period anyway and possibly not ever know you were pg unless you tested really early with a sensitive pg test. There is no way you would get pg and than miscarry again at 8 weeks (like I did) due to the lining not being ready because as I already said it would not hold for very long and you would just have your period as normal and at the same time (but maybe a little heavier). Which Sally, also makes sense to me She also said that when you get pg and it does stick (because the lining is thick enough) it will start to grow into the placenta straight way and the risk of miscarry due to other factors (not the lining) is the same regardless. SO Dh and I are satisfied that we can ttc whenever we want.... So I hope for a bfp straight away!!!

    Gosh I must really sound like I have multiple personality disorder after all my ranting over this matter... Again THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO HAS REPLIED TO MY QUESTIONS xoxooxo

  8. #62

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    Hello everyone.

    Big fat lurker, here again. This TWW is so hard! On top of that, I've had trouble getting onto BB the last few nights, and work has been awfully tricky.

    I am a big bogged down today. I wanted to say to Rhi I completely understand about your ideas about your uncle's passing. Maybe this will be the sign that your forever baby is coming soon? To paraphrase Karen Van (sorry Karen!), maybe the harmony between spirit and body is moving closer?? Today is my mum's 15th anniversary, and amongst the usual torrid jumble I am in at the moment, I am also wondering whether Mum might have a hand in a new small person coming soon? I'm also trying to not over think it (hilarious coming from a cancerian!!) because I'm not thinking very clearly and a bit of an emotional mess. This is just my usual annual event.


    to everyone. I'm reading along and keeping up, just really awful at replying personally to everyone. This thread is getting busier and busier ~ a fantastic support, but so not good that we all have to be here.

    Take care everyone.
    M

    PS - nearly forgot the best part. I had a pap smear on Monday and even my dr told me I was confusing her about what I was saying about TTC, and she suggested I shouldn't be concentrating on it so much. The universe is definitely trying to tell me something - keep my head down and my thoughts to myself I think.
    Last edited by meh; April 1st, 2009 at 06:01 PM. Reason: more detail

  9. #63

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    hi everyone,
    i fell asleep a little after 8pm last night - I was exhausted!

    Meh - hi there! sorry the tww is being so hard on you!

    Cherished - my fingers are crossed you get your bfp straight away!!!!!!

    coco - glad to hear the trip away did you the world of good. sorry to hear that you are having a touch one today.

    Jen - you definitely need to learn to say no lol. you are one busy girl

    Rhi - thanks for the maybe baby.. sorry to hear you are having a bad day. The amount of times that I have said to DH that I am never using any form of contraception again - I would rather 7 mistakes to 1 "trying". TTC sucks! It is such an emotional rollercoaster and m/c'ing just makes it all the harder

    charm- sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. feel better soon!

    sally - lol, chocolate is soooo good.. until you eat too much of it. I am trying to be good lately, but finding it hard - I love my chocolate

    Mel - sorry to hear that things have been a bit teary for you lately. I hope that you get your bfp soon so that you have a bf smile on your face!

    Hannah - I hope the medications start to make a difference soon.. and I hope the sleep deprivation eases up soon,.

    brb for an asm.. i am cooking a cake and the beeper is going off

  10. #64

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    ok i am back. and here is my AFM

    today i contacted sydney ivf to find out about the costs of the testing for recurrent m/c's should we want to take it any further.

    it will be $1500.

    we won't have to go to sydney as they can do all the testing remotely (so they would send me the referrals and I would get it done here and the test results would get sent back to them), which is good. there is only one test that we would have to go there for and the lady i spoke with said they could try to find something closer then sydney for me to get it done.

    but now... to just decide if we are going to go ahead with it. I am so worried that it will come back with no issues and then we would have spent $1500 for nothing... and then the other side of the argument is that if there is something wrong then it is money well spent to find out.

    we are booked in for our first lot of acupuncture this saturday - should we try that first and see if it helps before outlaying so much???? We are luckily able to afford it as we have been saving for a house and we also have savings going into a "bub fund" but i don't want to spend it (and waste that money we have saved so hard for) if there is no need for it.

    does anyone have any advice, suggestions or even "if I were you" 's - im open to hear it all!

    would you put all your eggs into the acupuncture basket or would you go for the full lot of testing which may not help????

    I should also mention that i get 10 days of spotting before AF which I am sure is linked to the m/c's because I have gotten spotting throughout both of the last 2 pregnancies - which is what I want to see the acupuncturist for.

    argh - the more i think about it the more I don't know what to do

  11. #65

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    Cherished - Glad you got a clearer answer. Like everyone keeps saying you will know what is right for you and sounds like you are really positive with your decission.

    Boble - Couldn't even begin to think how you must feel. No one can teel you what to do.
    I do seem to hear alot of things about these types of tests that when they come back that couple falls pregnant straight away cause they finally know what is going on, positive or negative.
    Personally I'd do it but I have just started doing acupunture so maybe go with that for a month or so then do the test.
    Im impatient, Id probably do everything all at once but Im into to all that stuff...

    rhichichi - Im starting to realise that. SO far most people have just been happy Ive given them an out to talking about it. Nothing anyone says is right, regardless so I might as well make them feel less uncomfortable!!

    Why is grief such a taboo subject??

    AND EVERYONE wants to say I know how you feel but they DONT!!!!!!

    ALSO
    I had a dream the other night that we had a baby girl and we named her Pearl.
    Someone in my dream asked me about it and I said
    "they don't always form properly but when they do they are so amazing and beautiful"

    THEN i realised that I think I will get AF between this weekend and next so exactly that time period in 2 weeks (fertile time) I would be on holidays in BROOME the PEARL catpital of AUSTRALIA!!!

    Should I think anything of it.... AND

  12. #66

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    boble - I know that Where There's Hope has done the SIVFrecurrent miscarriage program, and there are probably a few other ladies around BB that have done it I think too. I don't know if WTH will see this or not, but it may be worth posting a thread about it to make sure she sees it if you want to ask some questions about it? As for the acupuncture, I tried it and it did nothing to regulate my whacky cycles, we only got results with traditional treatment, but nevertheless I still think it is probably worth a go and I think I'd do both together HTH!

    everyone else!

  13. #67

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    Sally! OMG!!! That is so a sign! Fingers crossed for you and hope that month brings you some happy news and If you do get pregnant and its a girl will you be calling it pearl??

    That's so lovely and exciting! And it isnt even me!

  14. #68

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    coco -
    It is spinning me out!!
    I had a dream last time I was pregnant becuase I had what I thought was my period and didn't think I was for nearly a week after.
    It makes me nervous but excited and if nothing else its given me hope and something to get me through!!

    I thought I was just being silly so Im so happy you think its a sign too!!

    I do kind of listen to my dreams and I think Pearl is a pretty name.
    Totally new to the 'list' now,
    DH is still deciding. Maybe a middle name if nothing else but it WILL be part of the name!!!


  15. #69

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    Hey all,

    Just a quick one today - I have my great uncle's funneral this arvo.

    Eliza- Hugs. I know how you feel! I have been avoiding the shops in case of bumping into pregnant people. Keep an eye out in the post should be there tomorrow.

    Cherished - GL with ttc, I hope you get your bfp straight away too!

    Boble - If it were me, I would probably give the accupunture a go first, but put a time limit on it (ie: 3 mths) then get the testing in Sydney done.

    Meh - Had a giggle about your Cancerian comment - I am one too! hehe! It is nice to think that your mum is around, and hopefully she has something to give you?!

    Sally - your dream has given me goose bumps. OMG imagine if you get your forever baby then! that would be freaky! I work with a lady who's first name is Pearl and she is just lovely....

    Better go and get ready, I will try to be back later

    Hello to everyone else!

  16. #70

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    Sooooo sorry.... been so busy again today! Always thinking and for you all, tho! Will post tomorrow morning no matter what!

  17. #71

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    Rhi I am thinking of you today sorry to hear about your uncle.

    Boble I say goodluck with natural remedies I am a huge believer In them about finding out well everybody is different and I feel the need to know everything Im not very anal lol so trust your gut and do what feels best and trust yourself that it will be the right decision.

    Af has lurked again dammit twice in uhm 12 days well I am guessing this month is out so I jumped online bought more opk's and preg tests as I am spending a fortune buying them My doctor recomended physio today so I went I have had the back pain sice b4 I fell pregnant everybody said it was from the pregnancy well it isn't and I have faith in the physiotherapist he says its the vertibrae's and they are very tight so my back is in his hands and I am trying to get through each day without stressing about being TTC because it won't happen any sooner take care chat soon. for us all to be TTC soon

  18. #72

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    Just to let you know the final CVS results have come back all clear of chromosome problems!!! and i wanted to tell you the CVS showed we are having a GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!**************. Weird to think I already know what Im having and Im only 12 weeks!!! Only good thing about having invasive testing I guess hehehe.
    So seeing the genetic counsellor on Mon morn to talk about possibilities about what the fluid could mean but feeling a lot more positive atm. The Doc said that if the fluid resolved to a normal level by 20 weeks then we have a very high chance of nothing being wrong with the baby so fingers crossed! So next ultrasounds will be checking for a heart defect so still very worried and scared but trying to think how lucky I am to have an amazing little fighter still with me!!!

    Sally - Thats beautiful about the dream I really hope it comes true!!

    Cherished - Good lick ttc again Im so glad you feel ready to try again!!!

    Coco - praying this month for a BFP for you!!!

    Jen - You should be a moderator, the way you support al of us ladies is just amazing while you are still feeling the pain of loss! Thankyou soooooo much.

    To everyone else - Big hugs, hoping I can bring some more positive news to tell yu all soon. xoxox

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