Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ May 08

[Where there's hope]

Forgot to mention -
AJC - would love to share info with you about IVF. Are you doing it because of DH's sperm issue or to prevent further miscarriages with PGD? Sounds like you have a fantastic and supportive OB!

[Katiegirl]

Hi all. I haven't been posting much in here but I wanted you to know that I have been reading your posts and thinking of you all. I hope you are all doing well.

Where's the Hope - welcome and I am very sorry for both your losses. I hope you find much comfort and support here. You will realise very quickly that this is an amazing group of women. This forum helped me greatly after losing Nathaniel, and I hope you find the same comfort I did. I hope your stay here is a short one.

I wanted to add to the naturopath debate - and this is something I have posted about before so for those who have read this, you have the right to skip over - but I started seeing a naturopath 1 month after losing Nathaniel. I decided that I would do whatever it took to help ME feel I was moving forward and helping myself and my future chances of pregnancy. I have had regular naturopathic and kinesiology sessions since Jan, and I really do believe they have helped me mentally, emotionally and physically. My first ob (who I have since changed from) was quite dismissive of me seeing a naturopath, and I think that would be fairly common amongst drs. Some drs simply do not see the benefit of alternative medicine. My current ob is more open and he even has the brochure for the natural medicine clinic I attend in his rooms. I did get him to check the supplements I was given and he ok'ed them all.

So Where's the Hope - long story short - if seeing a naturopath or acupuncturist etc helps you in feeling you have some control over your body and are doing positive things for yourself and future pregnancies than I say go for it. I would suggest you see a naturopath who specialises in fertility as they will be able to offer advice on whether you need to start IVF yet or to wait - they would also be able to support you through your IVF journey.

That is all from me...sorry about the rant!

[tina_k]

hello girls:

please help! AF was due 3 days ago, still hasnt show, but im testing every morning, and still a HUGE BFN! this wait is killing me! Has anyone else had this experience?

WTH: welcome, hope you dont have to hang around too long!

jen: thank you again for your personalised message, they always make us feel special!

plc: hope all is going well with your pg...

...and all you other girls who are carrying special parcels i hope you are looking after yoursselves and enjoying it!!!!

hi to everyone else...sorry i cant get to you all...

ive gotta get packing as DH and i are going to Hong Kong tonight for 10 days...so i will miss you all! Im expecting lots of BFPs while im away ok!!!! still praying no AF for my holiday, but ive got some serious period pain this morning...not a good sign

[AJC]

tina - have fun in Honkers. Dh and I went there a few years ago and had a great time - it's a very lively city. You'll certainly get some good retail therapy that's for sure! Enjoy! Sorry about the BFN's - hopefully it's just too early. But if af arrives at least you'll be distracted by you fab holiday and by the time you get home (all nice and relaxed) it will be bd time and I'm sure it will be a BFP then!

WTH - we will be doing IVF because of DH's sperm issue. He is going for another test within the next few weeks so will be interesting to see if the results are still the same. He doesn't eat that well (shift worker) and hardly ever remembers to take his vitamins (although he's taken them every day since ob gave us the s/a results). He doesn't exercise as much as he should either so the results to be perfectly honest didn't really surprise me. I don't want to be too hard on him though but I know there are some things that he can do to improve his health and he has made an effort over the last few weeks so hopefully he'll keep it up and we might see the benefits in a few months time.

I certainly am not dismissing natural therapy either - I just had a bad experience with a kinesiologist last year, I was emotionally vulnerable and felt she was out to take advantage of me. I had told her about my m/c (only had one at that stage). She wanted to start me on all of these supplements which would cost in excess of $1500, i told her that it was very expensive and her reply was 'so is IVF'. That immediately annoyed me and I never went back to her or anyone else. I wish doctors and natural therapists could live together in harmony and work together for the benefit of their patient.

jen - like I said to WTH, DH is making an effort with the vitamins but I still don't think he is exercising enough or eating well enough. he's a shift worker and often skips meals. he does put on weight easily so he's been on the tony ferguson diet which is great but he will often just have one of their shakes for dinner. I've tried to encourage him to have the soup ones and add veges to it but quite frankly he's too lazy to pack it each morn or evening. It really frustrates me but I try to be patient because the last thing we need is to be upset at eachother.

mollycat - thanks for the babydust, glad your extensions are going well.

Have a great weekend everyone - sorry this post is so long but I really find so much comfort in talking to you all.

[plc1805]

WTH - honey my ob (whom I respect and trust with my life) is not supportive of naturopathy and only smidge more supportive of acupuncture. I get the impression he believes it's all a bit of "witchery". But he didn't tell me not to do it - he said that that was up to me. I can understand how bewildering and upsetting ur ob's stance on these issues as well as on IVF (which I'm surprised about). I think the body goes thru a heck of a lot when m/c's occur and some people need more time physically and emotionally before TTC again. So please be kind to urself - even when u don't feel that ur getting those needs met by medical professionals.

My naturopath gave me a some vitamins and minerals and this drink to take (don't know what it was to this day but must have been a winning formula costing $180 a bottle!!). She specialised in fertility and reassured me that I would soon fall pg. I started seeing my acupuncturist a little bit later and his herbs were a lot cheaper (like $9 a bottle). I was seeing the acupuncturist more regularly (every week compared to every 6 weeks with naturopath) and built a great rapport with and trust in him. The acupuncturist addressed the issue of kidneys as mentioned before as well as metabolism (and possibly fluid intake). In the end I had 2 appts with the naturopath and after forking out $800 during these appts, I felt I had no other option but to continue only with the acupuncturist and focus only on his treatment and herbs in case I came across a conflict along the line with the treatments and herbs. Not all naturopaths may charge that much and money may not be an issue for you but all up I am quite happy to go just with the ap and continue that treatment into my pg. In short, I believe both naturopathy and acupuncture hold a good place in the process of TTC. So that was another rant for you - .

hey tina honey - thanks all is going ok but that doesn't stop me from being sh*t scared that it will turn south tomorrow. I'm much more edgy this time and wish i could just relax... Enjoy HK sweet - you sound like you deserve a holiday esp with all that work you've been doing. Did you get my pm about the ap? I wish you well, hun!

Vanaithi - good to know where you stand with ur results. Honey - whatever you feel - just go with it. I don't think there is any point post m/c when you feel ok about it - just less upset perhaps. Keep strong hun - u will get there - just a matter of believing it hard enough.

AJC - I wish the natural therapies and medicos would live in harmony too - so much easier for us . That is a disgraceful amount of money to outlay - I don't blame ur reluctance to go back. There are cheaper options out there too tho. Big hug hun - I really hope it happens for you soon.

Katie - great to hear from you, sweet, hope ur well.

mollycat - sweet - sounds like ur going great guns at ur place at the moment!!! I hope the out of whack cycle could work in ur favour - there's always hope right?

Hey jen, smilanatu, betty and everyone else (refer Jen's list ) - huge hugs and best wishes as always.

I'm ok - got an appt tonight for 2nd hcg test. Think I'll stop after this one and let nature just work it out for itself. I need to start enjoying the pg as I have been waiting so long for it and think i deserve it. What will be will be. Also I hope I haven't offended anyone by saying what I have said in the past few posts - simply my humble opinion based on my experiences and my mind is open enough to learn more about anything on this all-consuming topic.

[Vanaithi]

Hello everyone!

Welcome Where There's Hope! I hope your stay here is short & sweet!

My bt has come back good for the rubella etc... & with the hpg test it was below 6 so non pregnant! i guess that does mean i may have ovulated on mon or tues cos my boobs were sore then. So i am doing the tww thing now? Feeling a bit emotional since last night... so not having many positive thoughts atm... feel like crying!

Well I hope everyone is doing well & to everyone! GOODLUCK!

[Where there's hope]

Got another question for anyone with any ideas on uterine linings after D&C

My first AF 28 days post-D&C was on time but lasted for two days and moderate. Then stopped abruptly. I did spot on Day 7 a few hours after BD. I have read the first period can be light. Question: is the first AF after a D&C a reflection of the strength/thickness/thinness of the uterus? I am wondering because I am keen to TTC this month (and my pre-ovulation signs are good - EWCM for the past three days), but don't want to risk a potential bubba not attaching properly.

Any thoughts? Luving the feedback - so good to have this outlet!

[AJC]

plc - ranting is fine. I think it's great that we can all be so open an honest about our experiences. We all have so much to learn from each other - whether we follow the same paths or different ones. GL for your bt tonight, am sure bubba is growing really strong.

Vanaithi - hope you caught the eggie!

WTH - sorry I can't be of much help with your lining Q but here's a From what I have read a light period following a d&c is very normal.

[Jodsan]

Hi everyone,

I've been on my month off TTC, so I've been away for 2.5 weeks and apologise if I'm not up to speed, I couldn't possibly read all the posts. We managed to get through O time without cheating (we used protection) so I thought it was safe to come back in to BB again. It's been a really good "head" rest for me and I'm sure DH as well. I have lost about 1.5kgs too (cant work out how to change my ticket yet though!).

Huge congratulations to PLC, wow!!! Hope the second hcg is really good.

Big hello to everyone,(Im sure I'll get up to speed over the next few days) I have missed you all

[issy02]

Hi ladies,

WTH - I too had a very light AF after my d&c and my cycle length blew out to 45 days after it too. FS explained to me that until I have a normal AF (as in normal flow) it could be difficult to conceive and furthermore, have an egg attach. This is because when you have a d&c, your uterine lining is obviously thinned down, which would be what it does naturally at the time of AF. So when your progesterone reaches a level that prompts it to release the lining at the end of your cycle, the lining is thin due to having a forced 'thinning' during d&c procedure (hence the light AF). If you allow your body to go through its normal cycle, releasing hormones at the right times and allowing your uterine lining to thicken again in your luteal phase (the second half of your cycle) you reset your hormone levels and thus the uterine lining, which is essential for successful implantation. This is why many dr's will suggest waiting a few cycles to begin ttc again....(apparently)... im no dr but this has been the advice given to me thus far.


It kind of makes sense, since your hormone levels and uterine lining work together and when the presents of hcg and a then a d&c procedure interupts this process, we may need to give it more than 1 month to reset and get back to normal.

In saying all that, some women have gone onto conceive again straight after a d&c and went onto have a normal and healthy pg'cy. So who knows really?

FYI - I also had some light bleeding half way through my cycle after my d&c, and this was because my body recognised that the lining was not optimal for implanation (due to being thinned out before a time other than AF, it had begun to thicken again by the time ov came around in the next month) so it tried to shed some in anticipation for ovulation.

Sorry if this post makes no sense or is completely useless information for you, just thought I would share what I have been told. Obvioulsy when push comes to shove, you just need to do what you feel is right for you, and this may mean giving yourself the chance to heal and 'reset' things as such, to give yourself a better chance of mainting a healthy pg'cy, or to keep ttc...as I said, some women have had success straight after a d&c. Good luck hun in whatever you do.

Issy

[Where there's hope]

WOW, issy02. Thanks so much for your explanation. That is the most information I have been able to find on the subject anywhere! Maybe we should wait for the second period. That certainly changes my plans for Mother's Day...