Ruthie - I am speechless .... and just so so sorry to hear of the very cruel news you have just received. I am thinking of you and sending every comfort I can without actually being there to give you a great big hug. Your beautiful little baby had 10 weeks as a part of you and was given every bit of love you had to give. Don't try and make sense of this yet hun because it just makes no sense.... I have tears rolling down my cheeks Ruthie knowing your pain exactly and wishing you didn't have to go through this again....
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow too pm me if you need...
Ruthie
I am so sincerely sorry. I wish there was something I could say or do to ease your heartbreak. I hope you are able to get some sleep and find some inner peace. Please look after yourself as best you can
Smi, Jenushka, Mollycat, Dellydoo, WTH, megsmum & Plc, AJC.. Thank you dear ones... I know you all understand me.. I was not expecting this today... I was daydreaming for weeks to see the baby move and listen to a wonderful heartbeat again... nothing.
When I think my eyes can't cry no more because they are so swollen... I start all over again.. I'm breaking apart.. when I got the news my knees went weak.. I fell to the floor with absolute no strength to stand up.. I curled there like an idiot and just sobbed in the middle of the room with 5 pregnant women there sobbing with me.. it was so painful.. I looked at all those huge bumps with pain, with anger WHY??.. my 3rd baby. I thought I finally was going to have this baby.. I thought all my pain was going to be over.. and again. Again??.. WHY???? I don;t want to sound whiny.. I know most of you if not all have been through this... just that today I didn't expect this.. I was not prepared... I was even thinking of celebrating my birthday this Sunday the 14th.. what F****g birthday... it is the saddest birthday I will ever celebrate.
I don't want to ruin anyone's day.. and again I don't want to be whiny... just that I thought that finally I was going to have my happy ending.. . right now I have to pretend to be strong in front of my son... he saw me break down in the hospital and the whole day for a matter of fact and he senses there is something wrong... he cried with me. I see him sleep and just hug him.. knowing he is my miracle.. and yet I feel horrible because he has no one to play with.. I wanted him to play with his own brother or sister so bad.
I am not going to give up.. I have no idea what the doctor will say after th D&C but I am TTC again.. I want this miracle... and even if I have to wait a month or two I will find a specialist now.. a doctor a perinatologist not only to help me get pregnant but to help me stay pregnant full term and have a live baby. It's like my worst fear came to life today.
I am in debt with you ladies.. you have been more than awesome.. my head is starting to hurt again because I have been crying nonstop.
so tomorrow at 7AM I get a D&C.. what a horrible procedure.. to think they kill babies that way.. and to think my precious angel is being treated that way.
But this time my health is at stake.. doc said I can let nature take its course but if baby has a week dead my body has not even started the process of expelling the baby and it can get ugly.. so I prefer to just "get on wit it" and go ahead and do the D&C. I have no signs that my body knows it is not pregnant anymore.. in fact I still have morning sickness.
Oh Ruthie I am so sorry honey! I am devastated for you. I don't understand the unfairness of life sometimes. Take comfort in your son. Even if he doesn't understand what has happened, he will understand the pain inside his mummy and he will be there to comfort you. It's amazing that children seem to have such a strong instinct for their mother's pain. Please look after yourself. My thoughts are with you, and I will be thinking of you tomorrow morning. Take all the time you need to grieve, but always remember that we are all here for you if you need us.
Ruthie - I am speechless and so deeply sorry. My are with you and please don'y feel bad about ruining our days, all of our thoughts are with you during this extremely painful period in time. I must say I am a little scared after hearing your news, I wasn't expecting it. Again I'm so sorry Ruthie
First to Ruthie - I am so sorry for what you are going through - my heart is with you. I have just had my first miscarriage and am devastated, so I cannot begin to imagine what you are going through. Hang in there sweetie
AFM: I miscarried one week ago today. It was my first miscarriage. I got pregnant through IVF - it was my first cycle. The last 6 weeks have been unbelievably stressful - the whole IVF process was pretty stressful and then I got mild OHSS and have felt very unwell from that. Last thursday had to go to hospital with severe abdo pain - they thought at that stage it was from a very large ovarian cyst which was bleeding - the cyst being a result of the IVF. I ended up bleeding friday and saturday blood tests showed I had miscarried. Since I was still having a lot of pain and scan showed a lot of tissue still in uterus I had D and C on Monday. It was a very emotional day - like Ruthie I just kept thinking about how the procedure is like an abortion - I also had an image of them sucking my baby out of my body and every time that came into my head I couldn't stop crying. Had to wait in a room full of other people having day surgery for about 2.5 hours before procedure - and I was in pain and really upset and that really didn't help matters - the hospital I had D & C really was a terrrible set up - no privacy what so ever. The nurse admitting me was horrible - she asked the following questions with no compassion what so ever - so your here for D& C for a miscarriage? Is it your first miscarriage? Have you any other kids? - at which stage I burst into tears as I do not and am so worried that I might now never have any; Am i married? (i am not but in lovely committed relationship) Do I have a boyfriend? - I mean how is that any of her business and how rude!! Anyway today is the first day the pain has settled down - had hours of pain yesterday (think it is still from the ovarian cyst).
Keen to try again - think I have to wait 4-6 weeks before I can have another IVF cycle - would like to try naturally this month. Does anyone know how long it takes after miscarrying to ovulate normally? - want to test for LH surge but not sure when to start?
Me (37) DP (50)
IVF i cycle - BFP - 5 September 2008 (6 weeks 4 days)
Oh Ruthie Im at work and crying at my desk.....Im going to have to run to the ladies to wipe the tears...Im so very very sorry and pray to the Lord that your miracle will happen, and that tommorrow comes and goes quickly for you.
' The Lord directs the steps of the godly, He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand' Pslams 37:23-24
Ruthie I am so sorry for your loss. You are not being whiny.. this is why we are all here - to discuss these things, share our joy when we have joy to share, and to vent when things dont go quite the way we plan. I can't imagine what this must be like for you to go through again. God will look after your three little angels. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. xx
pm me if you need...
You and your family are in my thoughts 
are with you and please don'y feel bad about ruining our days, all of our thoughts are with you during this extremely painful period in time. I must say I am a little scared after hearing your news, I wasn't expecting it. Again I'm so sorry Ruthie 
It was my first miscarriage. I got pregnant through IVF - it was my first cycle. The last 6 weeks have been unbelievably stressful - the whole IVF process was pretty stressful and then I got mild OHSS and have felt very unwell from that. Last thursday had to go to hospital with severe abdo pain - they thought at that stage it was from a very large ovarian cyst which was bleeding - the cyst being a result of the IVF. I ended up bleeding friday and saturday blood tests showed I had miscarried. Since I was still having a lot of pain and scan showed a lot of tissue still in uterus I had D and C on Monday. It was a very emotional day - like Ruthie I just kept thinking about how the procedure is like an abortion - I also had an image of them sucking my baby out of my body and every time that came into my head I couldn't stop crying. Had to wait in a room full of other people having day surgery for about 2.5 hours before procedure - and I was in pain and really upset and that really didn't help matters - the hospital I had D & C really was a terrrible set up - no privacy what so ever. The nurse admitting me was horrible - she asked the following questions with no compassion what so ever - so your here for D& C for a miscarriage? Is it your first miscarriage? Have you any other kids? - at which stage I burst into tears as I do not and am so worried that I might now never have any; Am i married? (i am not but in lovely committed relationship) Do I have a boyfriend? - I mean how is that any of her business and how rude!! Anyway today is the first day the pain has settled down - had hours of pain yesterday (think it is still from the ovarian cyst). 
5 September 2008 (6 weeks 4 days)
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