TTC after Miscarriage or Loss ~ April 08

**nicksterUK** · April 9th, 2008, 07:37 PM

Hi all- so glad to see so many new BFPs- issuing tonnes of sticky vibes adn baby dust for everyone (me included).
Has been a very stressful week so far- started bleeding suddenly on Monday lunchtime (heavy, bright red etc). Called DH and went straight to emergency dept and spent the rest of the day there. After numerous urine check/pulse/bp etc and 'chats' about the negative implications/hopeful implications (why can't they just get to the point 'is it dead or alive?') they looked for heartbeat. 2 people failed to find it and wanted to send me home to 'complete the m/c' but this fabulous nurse from gynae came down from the 6th floor and said she would do an ultrasound. It's normally only open between 10-12 so she and her Ward Sister opened it up especially.They clearly recognised that 'confirmation either way' was what was needed and hey presto- there was Junior, complete with heartbeat and waving. He (or she) was low down, but measuring 11 weeks 2days (11+ 4 today) and even did a somersault when they did the sonogram (obviously didn't like it). Think DH and I cried even more when seeing bubs than we did when we thought the worst. Anyway, there is one bub (not two but I don't mind) and he seems to be hanging in there...so far... The bleeding has slowed right down, but is still really red. Just hanging on to the fact that I'm not clotting, not got cramps and no backache. Am on bed rest (well sofa rest) for now so just waiting with baited breath... for the next 6 months maybe!!
Told you that I couldn't leave you yet- see, I still need you

Am keeping everything crossed- and will let you know how we go xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**JMG** · April 9th, 2008, 08:01 PM

Thanks to AJC, jodsan, jen805, smilanatum plc1805, canary, magda, and mollycat for your congratulatory wishes.

plc1805 - Good on you for the good result at your follow up appointment for your heart monitoring. Here's hoping you keep getting those good results.

Canary - Here's hoping that AF stays away for you and you are on your way for a BFP.

Magda - I understand how you feel about the no symptons, it is not very reassuring, but I bet in a week or two you'll be wishing those symptoms would slow down. They must just be building up to something big!!

Trac73 -

for having you BFP confirmed. Good luck for your journey.

Natty - Goodbye from this thread. Here's hoping we can meet again in the paml thread soon.

NicksterUK - Great news on your u/s. I bet your grateful for that nurse for coming down and giving you some peace of mind.

the bleeding stops for you.

AFM I am sitting by and being patient until my doctors appointment next Monday to confirm the BFP. After everything is confirmed, I can move onto the paml thread and hopefully sit back and enjoy this prenancy.

**plc1805** · April 9th, 2008, 08:04 PM

Oh nickster honey - what a HUGE scare!!! Come on baby nicki - don't scare ur mum and dad like that!!!!!!! He or she obviously thinks you are in need of some r'n'r and pulled a prank so that you are now forced to rest

. Sweet look after urself and make sure that DH is fussing over u!!! You are in my prayers!!

Natty - it is so good that u r moving on but i am sad to see you go as a valued member in here. Looking forward to seeing you again in PAML thread one day!

**bettyboop** · April 9th, 2008, 08:06 PM

exciting news AF arrived , has only been 176 days

**JMG** · April 9th, 2008, 08:10 PM

BettyBoop -

Wow congratulations on your AF. I know that is something we wouldn't normally go yay about, but

.

**AJC** · April 9th, 2008, 10:08 PM

Bettyboop - finally!!! I was so glad to read your post, now you can continue with your ttc journey and get that BFP very soon.

Nickster - sending you all the

in the world! Am sure all will be fine and you'll be holding your precious bundle safely in your arms before you know it.

Natty - so happy to say goodbye (because you've got your BFP of course). It's been so lovely to have your as part of this thread. Hopefully I'll see you in paml soon

Even if not I'll probably stalk it just to see how you are all doing.

Magda - can totally understand that your a bit nervous. Sending you lots of

and relaxation vibes too.

Canary - took me 8 months to conceive after my first m/c BUT.... saying that. I think I was just too stressed for the first few months and we had the timing a little out because my cycle was all over the place. Once I started temping we fell pg the second month. So I guess you could say it only really took 2 months to conceive (when we were trying properly). Hope that makes sense. This will be our 3rd cycle ttc again and I am impatient too.

One thing I would like to share with you all. Been doing a bit of reflecting lately - tww was sending me mad but I had a good think and if you knew whether you were pg or not within a day or 2 of O then you'd have to wait a whole month to ttc/O again. At least for 2 weeks you can hold on to that glimmer of hope and by the time af arrives and does her thing it's nearly time to O again. Does that make sense?

My angel bub # 2 edd date was this Fri, 11 Apr. Am trying not to dwell on dates but it's hard not to.

Sending you all lots of

and

**smilanatu** · April 10th, 2008, 01:04 AM

bettyboop...

I am simply thrilled for you!!! I hope all stays well for you and you get a BFP soon.

AFM: today is O day according to mymonthlycycles.com we have been BDing since Monday and will continue just in case...besides nothing wrong with BDing

I have my fingers crossed we get it this cycle as my birthday was Saturday and this would be a wonderful belated gift!!!

**Baby Angels** · April 10th, 2008, 01:34 AM

Oh nickster honey - what a HUGE scare!!! Come on baby nicki - don't scare ur mum and dad like that!!!!!!! He or she obviously thinks you are in need of some r'n'r and pulled a prank so that you are now forced to rest

. Sweet look after urself and make sure that DH is fussing over u!!! You are in my prayers.

Birthday Buddy..... couldnt have said it better myself.....

Nickster..... We are all here for you.... I may not post as often now but I m still here... keeping an eye on everything.... popin in now and again.

Focus on you girl.... and you know I m going to say it...... ONE DAY AT A TIME!

Try your best to keep your spirits up and enjoy jnr.... tell him/her off for scarin you.... let jnr know they have some major lovin they will have to give mum and dad when they arrive to make up for the little scare.

The absolute most important thing.... YOU. I m damn sure DH wont mind giving the additional TLC.

And dont forget I m here.... TAKE CARE

**smilanatu** · April 10th, 2008, 03:50 AM

Nickster...I'm keeping you in my thoughts!

Take care of YOU!!!

**mollycat** · April 10th, 2008, 07:20 AM

Betty -

yay, now you can really settle in to TTC.
Nickster - wow, take it easy and rest up while you can. Glad you got to see your little one - he/she must be feeling ok to be doing somersaults and showing off for mum and dad
AJC - will be thinking of you this friday, try to do something nice just for you.
Smilanatu - hope you get your belated birthday gift, i want one of those too. I should be O'ing on my birthday next week so

to both of us

**Anthonysmom** · April 10th, 2008, 09:56 AM

Hi ladies - just dopping in to send some messages.
Nickster - What a scare. Glad your bub showed you s/he was okay with the somersaults.
Betty - I am so happy for you. Now your BFP is around the corner.

Barbara

**plc1805** · April 10th, 2008, 01:19 PM

Hey ladies - hope all is ok with you all.

Betty - as mentioned on another post - just thrilled that you can start getting things sorted out! did the op you had help bring af on?

AJC - hun, what are great perspective re TWW which I'm going to find very helpful as i start all that up again soon. That perspective shows great personal strength and I hope you can draw on that tomorrow when you have ur reflections. Just hold on to the thought that, even though it is so very difficult cos you may not be able to hold ur bub physically, ur sweet angel is still very much with you in every other way. GL sweet!!

jen & smilanatu - i hope ur both getting lots of bding in!!

mollycat and smilanatu - hope u have/had great bdays!!!! (apart from all the bding, I mean

!!)

Anthony's mum - been a while - hope ur ok sweet

Speaking of bdays, how are you bday buddy!!!???? thinking of u lots and hoping ur path is not so rocky at the moment - i wish a nice smooth marble surface for you with the right amount of grip so that ur not slipping everywhere - too many slips in life as it is

5 sleeps to go for me til i see the ob - i think i might slip up myself a little and start my TTC a little earlier

it has been 7 1/2 weeks since the op after all....

**AJC** · April 10th, 2008, 01:55 PM

nickster -

Thinking of you.

plc - so glad you said 5 weeks till your ob appointment. I count down in sleeps to my ob appt's too.

jen & smilinatu -

Hope you get your BFP's in 2 weeks time!!!

**ll80** · April 10th, 2008, 01:55 PM

just a quick post, my notebook died and is off being repaired, harddrive failure, grrrrrr it's only 2 mths old.
going down to storage today to find my pc as dh and I both have university work to complete, why oh why did I start my masters lol.

Had blood test on monday to confirm everything and check my iron levels as they are still lowish, may need to go on a supplement.
m/s has started already feeling like I want to hurl mostly at afternoon and night. good sign though as this is what I was like with DD, not much when I had the m/c.

gl to everyone this mth, will catch up once pc is up and running, hand held sucks for posting.

nickster-take good care of yourself

..Laura

**seenabeena** · April 10th, 2008, 05:19 PM

Congratulations to all the ladies with BFP's ~ what a month

I am on CD45 and no sign of a period, a BFN 2 days ago and totally confused

I just wish I would get my period or a bfp just so I know. This waiting SUCKS! Will wait another week before poas.

**maybe baby** · April 10th, 2008, 11:32 PM

Sadly but still hopeful would like to join everyone here - I have just been told I have suffered a missed miscarriage (10.4 weeks). No signs, nothing. Am still in shock. Have a D&C tomorrow.

Can't believe this has happened

Sasha

**Baby Angels** · April 11th, 2008, 12:23 AM

Soooo sorry for your loss. I know there is nothing that will take the pain away but hopefully by being here and allowing yourself to greive then hopefully it will help....even if its only in a small way.

There is one thing I will say.... and every lady in here has heard it from me before.... take care of you.... and just do it all ONE DAY AT A TIME. Dont expect to much from yourself, dont allow others to expect from you.... just you do for you....

I havent posted the poem off the web site for a while and I think with all the recent additions to our little group I will

A Pair of Shoes

I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
Uncomfortable shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world.
Some woman are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don?t hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

You will get stronger... you will be able to see without the haze above you.... Just do it at your own pace.... ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGE HUGS

**jen805** · April 11th, 2008, 01:51 AM

maybe baby--I wish I had the magic words that would take away all your pain! Just know that you didn't do anything wrong--I think that's the hardest, yet the most important thing for all of us to comprehend. You'll find yourself consumed will all kinds of emotions right now--sadness, anger, confusion--it's all completely normal and is part of the healing process. Allow yourself to cry and vent, and don't expect too much out of yourself right now. Take the time you need to grieve. I promise there is a light at the end of the tunnel--we'll all help you get there. You're in my thoughts and prayers!