Hi Everyone.

Well I have had a very big weekend. Friday was not so good - I decided I wasn't preg and then got upset about it - two reasons - I was disappointed and also annoyed with myself for getting my hopes up. DH and I had a big fight in the evening, but I think we really needed to get some of it out. He admitted he often finds it hard having to listen to me whenever I need to vent etc, but he said he also knows that I need to be able to express myself. It is a difficult one. I also realised that I think I have been focussing on babies a bit too much of late, and need to try to give myself a break from it at times.

Then my best friend arrived from Syd on Saturday morning (she was coming for my DH's birthday party on Sat). It was wonderful to have her here. Sunday night was the party - and well I let loose! I have had barely any alcohol since the MC, and Sunday it was like I was rebelling against everything! I think having my 2 best friends at the party with me, helped me revert to my old single day behaviour. It was great fun, but I paid for it yesterday. And now of course I feel guilty because the first thing I thought when I woke yesterday was 'God what if I am preg'. DH told me to give myself a break, so am trying not to think about it too much. I have the naturopath this afternoon, so dreading telling her about my binge on Sunday. I never ever want to drink again, it had been a long time since I had experienced a hangover and it was really not fun. So it was fun to forget for a night what has happened, and it helped me get through seeing all our pregnant friends and babies.

So that is it for me. Angel Babies - I also had a temp dip 5 DPO and since then my temp has been rising (another dip on Friday - but still above the coverline on FF). I am now 10 DPO so not long until I hopefully will know. Though because I have not had a clear cycle since the MC in Dec (almost 2 months ago!!!), if I am not pregnant, then I really hope AF comes on time and does not having me waiting around.

I have a counsellor from SIDS and Kids coming this morning. She has been to see us once before, but this time it will just be me talking to her. She is lovely, but I am nervous.

Hope you all have a good day.