Hi Snowie,
I'm so sorry for your losses.
I don't have much of a clue about the doctors part, but I do understand the anger that spews forth. I'm trying to get a hold on it myself, as the usual person it's taken out on is DH and he so doesn't deserve it.
Maybe on the weekend when you have a bit of free time you could distract yourself and use your energies doing something you enjoy. It'll take your mind off whats going on inside for a while and it's healthy to have a break from emotional stuff.
For me these days, when I feel a tanty coming on, I'll grab the camera and race outside to take photos of things that catch my eye. Maybe they won't be the kind of photos I can share with others [as they may wonder why I'm taking photos of peoples fences. Ha!], but it allows me to use energy that I would otherwise use in a negative way were I to sit and ponder 'why me' and why everything seems to bite on those down days.
Good luck! And I hope you find your answers.
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