Ok i didn't know which would be the best section to post this. And it will be long, so you don't have to read it. I just need to talk.

My baby boy is 12weeks old and suffers from severe colic. Since he was born he has always been a 'screamer'. Then the doc put it down to colic, and from the research i have done he has all the symptoms.

I am a young mum...19...but i planned to be a young mum. And Khai is my first baby. So this experience hasn't been as joyfull as hoped. Don't get me wrong...i love my son as much as a mother could, but i have definatley felt like he'd be better off with someone else. No one ever warned me about colic.

I admit at times i wished i could give him to my mother until he 'grew out' of the colic. I really hope mothers of coliky baby's can relate, and that im not just a *****. But things just got so bad, i just got so frustrated, i would spend almost everyday just crying.

I would get no sleep at night, nor during the day so i was constantly tired and cranky. I couldn't take him out, and felt like i couldn't take him anywhere as he was just constantly screaming. I just wanted to stay at home alone all day everyday, where no-one else could hear him scream.

I wouldn't be able to leave him with anyone whilst i had a sleep or anything either...because i felt they would all get way too frustrated with the crying and i felt i was the only one who 'had' to 'put up' with it as he was my son. And i felt like the family didn't even want to be around him with his constant crying.

At times i had to just put him in his cot, turn the music up and let him scream and scream for as long as 10minutes. It was one of the hardest things ive ever had to do.

And i'll admit i yelled at my baby I would get that angry, and i know it was never his fault, but i would yell...begging him to stop screaming.

I have never been so frustrated in my life. I was frustrated at all the screaming. I was frustrated that there was nothing i could do to help my baby. I was frustrated that my partner was getting frustrated. And i was frustrated that i was getting frustrated with my poor innocent child.

I thought i must have had post-natal depression as i was constantly angry or crying, and didn't want to leave the house. And at times felt like i didn't want my baby Even the guilt of feeling like that breaks my heart.

There were more than a few times that i just wanted to run away, i felt someone else would be more capable of dealing with it. It really tested me, tested my relationship with his father. I regret not being able to enjoy every momment of my babys first few months. But i am so proud of myself. Although i had all of these feelings, i contained them, and i honestly feel like i am a terrific mother, and i know i am doing my absolute best. Even friends with babies say they admire me, as they didn't have coliky babies...they don't know how they would have dealt.

Altho i have worded this in past tense...it is all still my current situation. I have honestly tried everything. Infants friend seems to help sometimes. And he is on lovec for reflux.

Please, PLEASE tell me there are mothers who can relate. I would love to hear your stories. I need your help and support.