Oh girls (Crumpet and Teni) , it is so hard to face these pregnancies around you/us. And BB is one place i guess you have more power than ever to avoid whatever you care to. Go easy on yourselves. Don't do what you are not comfortable doing just for the sake of others. People that matter will understand. Thinking of you as you reach these dates. It is a stuffed up situation and there is nothing more I can say right now. I was going to say it gets easier to deal with/ manage. But today i feel like screaming so that is from another space entirely. Thinking of you.
Cheryl, hun be careful hun and rest up. I need to take my own advice. I have been so full on with other things and people I have just forgotten my own wedding anniversary. The balance is out in my life right now. Have to work at getting it back. I am feeling good hun, better than before health wise. I am happy and busy, pulled and twisted. Sometimes the balance is almost perfect and then the next minute i feel it building, moving towards out of control again. I guess what i mean is it is never far from the wobbles, like a top spinning. Can be such a fine balance and now more than ever i have learnt that i need to take care of myself, I can't just let myself go for too long. Thinking of you hun and rest up when you can. xoox
Dory, I have to say hun that I have let relationships go a bit. I have not been able to handle them as well as i would have liked to. I still have my wonderful friends but need more time for me these days. Like Cheryl, i don't feel like I have missed out necessarily...most of the time. I do miss what was that will never be again.
I am not sure I can help as i have needed the opposite really and that is to be left alone more and friends have wanted to be there. I have told my friends where I am at, as best i can, who I am atm and hope they understand and give me time. I have found that most people get it. Some people don't and to be honest i don't mind to leave them behind for the moment. I have not had the energy or balls to fight or justify. More than ever I have become someone that backs down. I hope that changes as i don't want to be a victim but i just can't be bothered right now. I would rather leave them behind. God this sounds horrible. Our needs have become so much more important. However every now and then I have found i explode emotionally. God i sound nuts don;t i...really I am not. I love my firends and find the juggle hard these days.
Boy that was a ramble. I think to give her space is a good thing. It sounds like it is taking your energy/thought and time...and that you need for yourself right now. Oh i wish we were good at practicing what we preach. I seem to get into trouble when i need things, support, reassurance and acceptance from someone else. I am trying my hardest to find it within myself...trying!
Oh hun, that was not helpful at all for you.
Angelicdragon, My hopes are still there for you hun. Thinking of you and hope you are feeling a bit better.
CharlieB, Sweety, sorry Af arrived but glad it gives you some regularity. Thinking of you and wishing the very best.
AFM,
Well, DH and I forgot out wedding anniversary yesterday...just remembered now. Oh dear, never mind. We don't get upset about these things. Everyday is a day to celebrate our love together.
Tired now.
SOrry for those i have missed. Got to go and get dinner going.
Love and thanks to all.
Gigi - thankyou. Every day is a day to celecrate your love - I like that a lot, it resonnates with me, becuase I agree. I don't think you are a victim at all, just your priorities have changed. Don't be so hard on yourself and rest up! I am getting much better at that - its just practise. It is hard to put yourself first isn't it? Hope you are not so tired today.
This time next week, a good friend will be in hospital after her c section. She is fearful and trying to accept this but finding it hard. I am trying to get myself ready to go to see her. I thought i might give my visit purpose and take her some food as i know she will also be suffering with hospital food and she loves her food. So I am trying to think of what I can take. If I get there and don't want to go in, at least i can leave food.
Anyway, that is today. This thread is so busy now, it is too much for me to leave it a couple of days...i struggle catching up.
Love to all hm oxxo
Blessedatlasst - yay Well done! You must be thrilled! Make sure you treat yourself for all of your hard work!
Dory and Gigi - thanks for your kind words. I agree, we do have to learn to treat ourselves better and put ourselves first sometimes. I find recognising when I need to do that is the hardest. I will endeavour to do that more often.
Crumpet and TeniBear - I find the build up to my EDD was very hard so I understand what you are going through right now. We decided to mark Ryan's EDD with a quiet picnic beside a lake in the late afternoon. We watched the sun going down and cast a flower into the water and said some quiet words and then sat there and watched the flower float away in the fading sunlight. We took some photos to remember the spot (we were in France) and to remember the day. We have shown my ILs who were respectful of the time, but no-one else. I guess it should be as public or private an event as you want - whatever feels right. I know some other ladies who released balloons with messages written on them, and written their baby's name in the sand at the beach. I hope you both find some way to recognise the day and be at peace with it.
Hi to Samcougar, aries, my2boys, charlieb, angelicdragon and everyone else.
AFM - had my GP appointment today. Pap smear was done but as I'm CD5 there was a tiny bit of blood which might render it invalid. If that happens I have to wait 3 to 6 months before another one! Oh well. Came out of the Dr's office with a handful of paperwork - more b/t day 1 and 21 usual tests, plus referrals for two specialists - one for IVF and one for a colonoscopy - yay! I get one done every 5 years because of a family history of bowel cancer so my GP has recommended getting it done before starting IVF again. I'm lucky that my GP is lovely - she was very encouraging about trying IVF again, so that was good. DH even made it to the appointment which was nice. DH hasn't had a drink since last Saturday night - he is such a wonderful caring man. I really hope that what Dory says is right and that even if he can't do this all of the time that it may make a difference!
Anyway, time to order pizza for dinner - our treat to ourselves for such a busy week!
Take care all and have a happy Easter! I hope the Easter bunny brings a fertilised egg to all of us
oxo
Well done! You must be thrilled! Make sure you treat yourself for all of your hard work!
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