Katie - glad to hear your spotting has stopped. my cycle is a bit crazy too. fertility friend said I ovulated 4 days ago but my chart looks a bit crazy. and yes you are right everthing is a waiting game. what exactly is a naturopath? i ahve heard several women talk about them but I have no idea what one does.

Jo - sorry about the spotting. i am glas to hear about your customer. it is great when people achnoewledge our children and ask about them. I have a friend who always refers to my son by his name. it gives anthony dignity and i cherish that.

Auntie M - i am so sorry to hear about your meeting. it is hard to realize that the pain never goes away. it all never ends. but there are things to look forward to. how is Pea-no nuts doing? is she a kicker? that is one thing i wish i felt. i never felt anthony move. i have said it before and i will say it again, all you pregnant women give me hope.

TM - hope all is well.

my conference went well. i did get some head tilts though followed by how are you with that look. i am pretty used to it. i was fortunate though b/c after i lost my son some of my close work friends put the word out for me before i ever got back to work. so there really wasn't anyone i had to tell myself. all of the women at the conference knew...well except one. i don't ven think sheknew i was pregnant which is weird b/c at the last conference we were all talking about it. anyway a week after i delivered i bought myself this beautiful angel charm for my necklace. i have worn it everyday to keep anthony with me. well this other teacher saw it and asked if it was b/c i am such an angel. a few of my coleagues looked up knowing that this was going to get uncomfortable. i told her no that the angel didn't represent me. she then asked who did it represent. i muttered "my angel." there are 70 people squished in this tiny room and I didn't want to break down in front of all of them. then she asked who is my angel. well that was it. it took all my power not to lose it. i told the women i would tell her later. the reminders are everywhere. normal has gone out the window. today was better. back to my regular work routine. tomorrow morning (right now it is 10pm thurs) i will call my OB. i am supposed to get more blood results back. i am terrified. monday i see a genetic counselor. never ending

barbara