Hi Everyone. I have just been reading through your posts and you all inspired me to write. Whilst we have not yet begun to embark on TTCing again, I thought I would pop in to ease myself back into this.

I lost our baby Nathaniel 2 weeks ago - found out at the 20 week scan that he had passed around the 15 week mark but I was able to carry until 20 - and then had a D&C. I had minimal bleeding after the D&C and I was hoping for a perfect (you would think I would know by now that this word does not truly exist) recovery. After 8 or so days of no bleeding, I started again this Saturday. I am now day 3 of bleeding - could this be my AF? I tried calling my Ob but he is on holiday until the end of the week.

We will start TTCing soon, but need to wait for 1 full cycle - so if I am having my AF now, it will be another whole month as this really is not a proper cycle.

As awful as it is to find others that have experienced the same pain and grief as my DH and I have, it is so comforting to hear others say how they feel their lives are changed for ever, and that their dreams have been shattered. This was our first preg and we were so excited. I am starting back at work on Wed, after 2 weeks off since finding our about the baby, and I am dreading it. I was going to finish up in Feb and become a SAHM, and now instead I have to accept that all this is on hold and that work is going to have to become a priority again. At times, I feel so lost and empty.

So, hopefully I will be able to join you all soon on the TTC journey. I am going to really need your support as I am feeling quite negative and terrified about trying again. Good luck to you all and I hope your journeys end the way you dream.