I have read through all your posts but sorry, I just am too exhausted to do personals at the moment.

I had my first appointment with the Psychiatrist this morning and after two heart wrenching hours he said that I Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It all makes sense now, the high levels of anxiety, the high BP, bad dreams, disturbed sleep, flashbacks and constant feeling of exposure are apparently textbook PTSD. He doesn't believe in medicating (which I wouldn't do even if he did believe it in) so we are going to work on it so that I can get through this pregnancy and get some sense of normality back. Turns out he lost a child at full term 36 years ago so even though he looked 100 years old, I felt really comfortable with him. We talked about what triggers my anxiety and he explained what happens to your body physically when you are suffering from PTSD. I feel validated in some ways and happy that I am finally going to get some help. At the same time I feel like this is yet another thing to have to cope with but I know I have to do it.

Well after a big cry I need a big sleep on the couch so I'll pop in later to do personals.

Thanks for listening.

Luv Spring