Tommysmum: I loved your post. It is so very true that we just don't often get it as humans until we have experienced the pain. The gift that this unthinkable tragedy does give us is an awarenes and understanding of grief. The reality of how fragile this life is and how we need to sieze the moment and live a life that is loving.
Again, your post was beautiful - thankyou for sharing... How are you going? How many weeks are you now? You will have to get a ticker so we can all keep track!
I am a bit snookered today - had a big one we have been down to the coast for DS footy and then to the beach for a swim and fish and chips.
i will pop back tomorrow.
Special thoughts and a very big hug and a cyber cuppa for you Spring...
Tommysmum - So true everything you said in your last post. You just don't realise what people must be going through until you are faced with it yourself. Last night DH and I had a massive cry and a talk....finally. And I said, which even shocked me, that if I had to choose between losing Asha the way we did or not having her at all and being none the wiser, I will still choose to have had her and go through this. not only because of what she has taught me about what is really important in life, but because I just love her so much, and I can't imagine not having her in my life, even as painful as it is. I hope that makes sense. My aunt lost a baby at 17 weeks about 20 year ago, and after we lost Asha, mum said she just didn't realise all thise years ago just what my aunt must have been going through.
Spring - I think that like you, I sort of felt that I had everything perfect. Sometimes I still say to DH "This didnt really happen to us did it?" Woo, hubby home for good soon!
Tommysmum - just beautiful. I have tears running down my cheeks.
Bailey - I agree. While I wish Cooper was here, I would rather this than to never have known him at all.
I wondered (once) would it have been easier to lose Cooper earlier on in my pregnancy. I have never wondered it again because if I had, I would never have met my little boy and enjoy his company for the special 9 months that I had with him. I am grateful for the time that I was given with him and while I wish it was for longer at least I had some time. My heart goes out to you special women that don't get to see, feel or hold your babies.
I have had a very difficult weekend but it is nice to come in here and talk about our angels and remember them in the special way that we can.
Spring - I have been thinking of you today and hoping you are doing ok. I agree with you about next Sunday, I am absolutely dreading it - DH and I are going to do something nice together but I think it is going to be a really tough day. At least we will all be going through the same feelings on the day, I think it helps just to know you girls are there through it all. Sorry DH had to go back, 33 sleeps will fly by - as is your ticker, everytime I look at it I cant believe it.
Lynn - I am so sorry you have had a tough weekend. Did you have a nice time at the ball or was it really hard? The amount of money you said they raised is amazing! Hopefully they can save someone else in the future from going through what we all are. Big for you and I hope you are ok, if you need a chat let me know.
Bailey - I feel the same, as painful as everything is I would never give him back. I love him with all my heart and and very thankful for having the honour of meeting him and knowing him for all those months. Nothing will change the fact they are our babies and we just have to remember that they are as much ours as they were when we were lucky enough to have them in our tummies
Tommysmum - Spring is right, there is some kind of instant bond that is formed between women who have experienced the heartache we have - whether it be multiple losses or a stillbirth. I also feel so close to the women in this thread and honestly care about each and every one of you. I never imagined I could care about people I have not met in person but I really do, and I think it comes from the mutual understanding we have of each other. I cannot imagine how hard it was for the women generations ago who lost their babies and firstly they were just taken away as if they never existed but then on top of that from what I understand society had the attitude of forget about it and it goes away. I think society still has a long way to go in terms of their compassion and understanding of grieving mothers but compared to those days we are extremely lucky. I can understand why those women still cry for their babies 40 years or so afterwards, I can not imagine not crying for Nicholas, nor do I think I want to stop completely.
Deb - You sound like you have had a busy but nice day, you must be extra tired with your little bean zapping all of your energy - make sure you rest up and bub can have a snooze
Hi to everyone else, hope you have had a nice weekend.
Lynn I am sorry I forgot about the Stillbirth Foundation Ball until Mel mentioned it. You are very brave for going. I was too chicken as you know. I hope you are ok, it would have been really tough.
Mel: How did the pasteries go? I would love to know what is in them, perhaps if you have the time you could email the recepie, that is if you are happy to share it.
Well, time for some dinner for me, oooh I don't have to cook, just reheat, I am so excited it is pathetic.
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