Just waiting on the invite first to see the exact wording. But with little things my Mum has said after spending some time with them, I am under the impression that she wants everyone to go all out.
And I am hoping that I might be jumping the gun and the bride is requesting it so our side of the family doesn't come as the country hillbillies that some of my relos are (and for the record some of my relos think a new pair of jeans and a new flannelette shirt is formal!)
What you have described you have sounds fine, but yeh I would confirm with your bro what they are after
We had a pretty casual wedding but wanted something a little more dressy than jeans so put semi-formal on our invites as DH's bro thought a black pair of cargo pants & a new motocross tshirt would cut it and some of my rellies are about the same, so yeh the hillbilly gene seems to run in most families
Little girls in gorgeous party dresses are just adorable
Last edited by ~Phoenix~; December 21st, 2009 at 08:41 PM.
: spelling
From what I can gather that black tie/formal often just means "no jeans". The last wedding I went to was like that, the one lady who turned up in a full length gown looked very out of place. There really needs to be a new term to cover "no jeans"
I agree, what you have in mind sounds fine to me. I think if you go all out with a proper floor length gown, you may end up looking like a bridesmaid!
Have you had a look on ebay for the kids dresses/suits? There are some really nice ones you can get cheap. For our wedding, I actually got DS (15 months at the time) a full tux brand new for $40.
So my dress fits in colour wise, and I will be wearing it. But what to wear for DH? (he has a suit, but isn't black)
I have also got my grandmother here, and she has asked the same question.. She has a dress she bought to wear on a cruise last year (and also intended to wear it to the wedding), but doesn't fit the colour scheme. Can they really 'tell' you what to wear? My aunt has also asked me before Xmas, but I asked to talk to my bro, cause if I ask for everyone, it is going to look like I am causing trouble (my mum already thinks I am being a biartch about the wedding )
Just want a general idea of you lovely ladies.
I am going to ask my bro in about a fortnight or so, as SIL's father passed away from cancer last week.
Oh my, I have never heard of a wedding where they asked the GUESTS to be colour co-ordinated!
I agree with the general gist of this thread that your dress is probably fine.
Your DH is a tricky one- but if you can't afford to get a black suit just for the occassion (perfectly understandable, by the way), I am sure your brother would rather have you there than not, even if the suit is the "wrong" colour. I would probably speak to your bro about it if you can.
Last edited by amberj; January 12th, 2010 at 10:37 AM.
: Oops, should have read previous post properly
Oh dear, I've been to lots of weddings and never once have I been told to colour co-ordinate - the dress code yes but definately not colours.
For your DH is it possible to hire a suit and use own shirt & tie?? I know I've seen ads on TV for some of the major chains like Ferrari (in SA) offering deals from about $50-70 and you generally get it for the weekend, from thurs/friday to the monday.
Black tie 100% means dinner suits for men without question.
just stating formal on the invite means any suit and tie normally but for women the rule is generally knee length and no bare shoulders. At least thats what i was told...
I would say that stating set colours meant they were rude enough that you didn't have to follow their dictates exactly... there is a limit with what I'll do for an invite. Speak to the bride. Honestly. Have EVERY SINGLE famiy unit in your family run their outfits by her. I understand black tie, I understand strictly black tie, but I cannot condone dictating colours. You're not bridesmaids! What next, demanding waistcoats for the men and the height of the heel for women? What about children and their clothes? The fact it has come AFTER many guests have bought clothes would upset me too.
I would just buy a cheapish black suit. And have, for DH - he has relatively inexpensive black and grey suits now after his lovely bespoke suit fell apart in under a decade. Three holes!
Women can get away with a nice dress as long as its not a summery print like floral or something. Something black always works well with a nice pair of gold/silver shoes if you have them. It adds a nice contrast to the black dress.
Mens suits can be black, grey or navy and with a shirt and must wear a tie.
Black tie is bascally no open collars, denim, beige pants or sport coats ect. Men have to wear a tie and dress shoes.
ok, she needs to be pulled up on this! thats down right rude telling her soon to be SIL that she cant go to HER BROTHERS wedding because of colours! weddings are ment to be fun - not a down to the what people are wearing affair! and for her brother, well..he needs to be melly bashed followed by a thwack upside the head with a toboot! i hope she comes down off her thrown! gah, what a way to 'join a family'
(and for the record some of my relos think a new pair of jeans and a new flannelette shirt is formal!)
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ok, she needs to be pulled up on this! thats down right rude telling her soon to be SIL that she cant go to HER BROTHERS wedding because of colours! weddings are ment to be fun - not a down to the what people are wearing affair! and for her brother, well..he needs to be melly bashed followed by a thwack upside the head with a 
toboot! 
i hope she comes down off her thrown! gah, what a way to 'join a family' 
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