Jules - with the fess, we use both parts. I had some horrid trouble getting Will to stay attached, he was a bit snuffly so I used the fess, and it didn't feel like we got anything out, IYKWIM, but he was no longer snuffly and attaching and staying attached. So may be worth a try for you???

You know something that's weird? With Pip, I didn't co-sleep. I used to have horrid nightmares though that I had suffocated him in my sleep - and that was from when I was just playing with him on the bed! With Will I co-sleep, and no nightmares - go figure?