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Thread: Babies Born November 2006 #30

  1. #19

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    i think its all just part and parcel to be honest with you. it's like we think if we do everything we can for everyone else to make sure they're happy then we can handle whatever we are dealing with on our own, and quietly for that matter.
    its so easy to do and i know i say all the time that i feel unappreciated but when dh asks what he can do to help i am clueless, not only that but when someone offers to do something for me, i feel obliged to say no because i should be doing things.
    i think we need to say no to others more and yes to ourselves because if we're not functioning properly then we're no good to others...easier said than done i know. but its true that its so important to have 'me time' and be so so so selfish about it. in the long run, everyone's better off


  2. #20

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    we are baby free tomorrow night DH xmas party I promise no drunken let's make a baby moments

    I know what you mean about forgetting about ourselves - I have been wearing clothes that USED to fit me and now my pants look like clown pants but I can't justify the expense of a whole new wardrobe - bcos NOTHING fits properly - nor the time. I used to love shopping and bargain hunting now I look into a shop and go no too hard, then Jake spacks out in shops.... man if only ... sigh ... and then I buy boggan loads for Darren and Jake and think no I don't really need it.

    and that takes me to the DH xmas party what to wear stress.... I dug out sme pants that the last time I wore was just after mum died (I turned into an exercise junkie to cope with stress now I just have a child lol) so they are 4 years old but black pants are black pants but the top ... not sure... dug out a slinky black singlet or a black boob(less) tube but I look a bit too bad-Sandy ala Grease.

  3. #21

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    i'm sure you'll look lovely nelly, how could you not!

  4. #22

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    thanks tara just about 5 years out of date fashions!!!!! or if it's too tight I'd look like a black sausage trying to be sandy from grease when she went sexy! rofl sorry I pmsl at my twisted humor

  5. #23

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    pmsl at black sausage...if you're going to go as a sad sandy at least have a ridiculously long wilted cigarette hanging out of your mouth and say "coffee hun?' a lot ROFPMSL

  6. #24

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    LOL black sausage! too funny. Go black pant and black jacket - i wore that all the time when i was preggers and i still wear that when i cant be bothered thinking about to wear. I hate thinking about clothes too even though i'm back to my pre-baby weight....things are just hanging where they shouldnt be.... I'm not a big girl but ella was a big baby so i was stretched...gawd dont want to think about it.

    Here's an idea... when you come to Sydney we can hit the shops! Cambelltown is further out though...

    Ann

  7. #25
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    i've just emailed Christy, Blanchie, AJP, Luaa, Nelly, Kim, the pic of bilby on ozclothnappies yahoo home page, along with the url. i thought i had your email addies Vicki and Taralee, but i either don't or they are not under Vicki or Taralee - some email addresses are in the name of the partner, and i usually don't remember them, i type in the woman's name and wonder why it doesn't come up.

    like my friend Rhiannon, her email address is Matt etc, so i go to type in Rhi - expecting the autofill to put in her addy - and of course, don't get it unless i type in Matt etc. confusing.

    LOL about the Sandy from Grease etc. I finally stopped wearing my uber comfy Big W fold down stomach "yoga pants" that i got five pairs of and absolutely LIVED in during my entire pregnancy, so comfy, but yes, like clown pants now!!! i miss them!!! Havne't got replacements, too hard to go shopping with bilby. ANd yes, my days of being the opshop queen extraoordinnaire are over, how i could fit the pram in those little spaces and not have her crack up!

    i raced in Bras n Things and got two sleep singlets with shelf bra tonight, so sick of wearing maternity bras 24/7. No longer shopping for bargains - that takes time i don't have, now i am on a mission, i nip in, nip out, done.

    Sorry to hear the morning sickness is bad Taralee, you poor possum, if not preg, you have endo pain, if preg, m/s woes - it's not fair!

    Christy - it's awful when you feel misunderstood, but listen, it's not just the puppies, WE care about you too!!! what do you mean, look up bilby? Do you mean the animal? or my baby? just wanting to make sure i know what you mean. There's alot of wonderful work being done in Queensland to make sure the bilby doesn't go from the dangerous low levels to the extinct catergory.

    I am so glad i have no Xmas events to have to dress up for, i've forgotten how! We have a NYE party to go to, with a Japanese theme, looking forward to that, our old neighbours, this lovely gay couple who are both so lovely, best neighbours i have ever had, boy i miss them, and they throw fantastic parties. One is a mad keen gardener so the place looks like a bamboo jungle and his partner is a fantastic cook plus we have big raves about music. So it'll be a great party, cos they really put in the planning and have the contacts to make it go "off". I have a 1950's japanese silk dress that i'll wear. thanks to two really bad bouts of gastro this year, i will fit into it!!!

    the thing about putting yourself last, i am forgetting to eat and drink, that's my NY resolution i think, to remember to eat and drink. I never forget to feed bilby but when it comes to me, doesn't seem to register or matter.

  8. #26

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    putting ourselves last hmmmm....

    Tonight DH has his xmas party. He says "I wont be out for long". He's been moping around the house over the weekend sick so... i thought sure. Home by 12. Its now 2am. I cant sleep. i was up late last night too. DH wanted me to help with his costume and wouldnt let me go to bed....I'm angry, tired and feel unimportant. Why do women change, take responsibility, when they have kids but men dont! it frustrates me to no end!

    I wonder why i bother to stay with him. I mean i do everything (but cook) any way. I could make it on my own. No problems.

    Just feeling like [email protected]

  9. #27

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    Still here ladies....been reading but not posting.

    Hit rock bottom last night...both girls were screaming. Chelsea was refusing every spoonful of food....and i cracked it. I has to stop myself smacking Chelsea so hard...i grabbed her and kinda threw her to the ground (ok that sounds badder then wat i thought and did..) but she is fine. I grabbed the car keys and wallet, slammed the door and took off. I only came home 2 hours later because i needed to go to the loo....

    Gigi Bilby is a cutey in her pic on nappy site

  10. #28

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    Kim - how are you feeling now? I cant even imagine how hard it is for you with 2 kids. Ella gets to me sometime and there's only one of her!

    Well DH is home now. Drunk and telling me i'm wrong and he's now fast asleep on the sofa!

    Going away for a while now to think about things.

    Ann

  11. #29

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    Not feeling to good right now....TBH when i said to the girls and Craig when i was walking out the door 'im going to find the nearest tree....' it was the first time i really ment it...

    And when i got home Craig asked how i was and i said 'fine....but if i went out again...i wont be coming back'...i ment that too...

  12. #30

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    aww kim i hope your feeling better today, i know you dont want to go on to AD's but i really think you need to see someone not just for your sake but your families.
    i know it might seem harsh but is chelsea wont eat, too bad she goes without, otherwise you both get stressed, walk away and try again later.
    i have some down days but not like i was having early on, im happy and stable and only on 25mg of zoloft every second day, im happy with that.

    ann naughty DH, they just dont get it sometimes do they, next ime he can sort out his own costume!!

    man im been harsh today arnt i!! overwelming tiredness to blame!!

  13. #31

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    wow! definately something in the wind with us lot! I had a mummy melt down last night too. and walked out and left Richard with it. Laura has been just delightful to be around NOT!! and i was so angry last night that I knew if I didn't leave I would say or do something that I would regret. so I left, and came home once the kids were in bed. And richard managed. Maybe I should do it more often. As women we do tend to put ourselves last, when in fact the order of priority should be us first - because if we aren't ok, the whole ship starts sinking! we are the drivers, navigators, directors, and all the other adjectives you can think of that mean we keep the family going!! and it is exhausting. Somtimes I think, shall I just cut a vein, and you can suck the blood out of me (usually feel like that when i have gone beyond the bottom of the barrel, and are scraping through a hole in the barrel!) When you feel like that its time to feed your soul!!! so I will be. As should all of you too!! motherhood is the hardest job in the world, the least valued, or appreciated. :hugs: to all of you - me as well!!!!

  14. #32

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    oh girls We are not alone in this.

    Kim; its totally frustrating when you are dealing with one, stressing over food, and the other one wants you. I have often walked into our bedroom & laid down with the covers over my head while listening to the screams. I've often walked out of the house but refused to drive... and just gone for a walk.
    Mate, I agree with Jols... just try & find someone to talk too. Have you checked out the beyond blue website? Thats the one that helped me most the second time around.

    Ann - ah man. Thats so hard... guys just somehow forget that having children includes them.

    Gigi - yep I meant your bilby Love the photo, she's gorgeous. I haven't heard much about the bilby up here... but it may be because they don't get brought into the vet clinic... now I will have to look them up too lol.

    Me.... going okay so far this morning. Matilda's had 3 tantrums already which woke everyone up. I almost cried, almost and then I stood up & tried to be her mother instead. She's happily watching TV atm and I'm happy we are peaceful.

  15. #33

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    Girls I've just been thinking about us & I want to encourage us to let loose and support each other by telling each other postiives as much as possible. So if someone has touched you in someway, tell her straight away. Okay?

    Vicky & Tara - thank you both so much yesterday for your PM's. It was so lovely to get them & know that you were thinking of me I can't believe how thoughtful a simple PM could be... simple but so helpful when I was down. Thank you lovelies!!

  16. #34

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    yep i think we all need a big group hug

    christy apart from the tantrums this morning how are you feeling???you got me worried when i read your posts, what are your christmas plans???

    GIGI very cute bilby love the curls!!

    VICKY, i thin k we under estimate our partners ability to cope especially at bedtime!! i think it easier to leave them to it when its not planned!!

    ANN hows DH head this morning??? is her blaming you for that too :P

    TARA hows the m/s going??? sick of the peas yet??

    NELLY how did the party go??

  17. #35

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    im one for not publically thanking you girls enough!! i do manily through pm, so


    thankyou everyone for all the pm's ive had over the past 12 months, especially a few weeks back from Ann, tara and a phone call to vicky, love each and everyone of you all!!!

    *mwah* *mwah* *mwah*

  18. #36

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    Jols the last few weeks have been really bad mentally, slowly going down for me. But I knew it... I was standing by & watching it happen. And I didn't do anything to help myself, I was so busy getting the girls and Christmas shopping done, and worrying about others that I just let myself slide.

    Well on the weekend I was supposed to take Saturday off. But we wound up in the hospital for 5 hours with Jovie, so on the way home we talked about it & I went to the GP on Tuesday. I've upped my medication because I was only half a tablet & she thinks that there was too much stress in my life , causing things to go down. Jovie being sick & me being in pain for 2 weeks just made things bad. Being in pain really wears on you... physically, emotionally... I just ignored it the first week & then struggled to cope through the second one.

    SOOOOO.... on Monday a friend came over upset because her fiance broke up with her & I got worried about her, she was in a very dark place for 3 days & just hung out with us all day long. Which didn't help my mental state...

    Sooooo... I've dedicated next week to Christy spoiling. I have 2 days without the kids (booked Jovie in an extra day just for me) and may just do nothing, but I think I will have a massage and just work on doing something special for me. I may even take the train into the city & have lunch with DH. Have a nap... something out of the ordinary.

    Thanks Jols *mwa*

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