functioning on 3 hours of broken sleep. those storms were mega and DH had to drive home from Brisbane in them so i didnt sleep until he got home at 2am
Last edited by taralee; November 20th, 2008 at 07:11 PM.
BellyBelly Life Member - Love all your MCN friends
Jun 2004
The Festival State
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oh Tara, i'm glad your dh is ok! no wonder you coudln't sleep until he got home.
have we got any brissy people? is gold coast close to brissy?
will vicky be in affected areas?
Us: apart from damm vandals who have cost us $1,000 in three weeks, and nasty neighbour making threats, we are ok. bilby went to Gymbaroo today again and loved it, although 3.5 yo boy with autism, who doesn't know his own strength, hurt her arm, literally dragging her around by her arm, until i saw it and yelled STOP, sprinted to scoop her up and rescue her (he towers over her). i'm not sure he realised what he was doing, but she was so upset, she clung to me for rest of session. The boy reacts to certain foods, his mum has him on Failsafe, but yesterday, someone gave him a food he shouldn't have, and his behaviour was all over the place, as a result. His poor mum was so embarrassed.
i am finally getting bilby's photos done on Sunday - luckily i paid for it BEFORE second vandalism attack, otherwise i might have called it off. (insurance excess x 2 + $1,000 that we didn't expect). I organised a photographer so it will happen this time. am all ready with denim shorts and white tops for bilbs as i've been told is a good place to start. botanic gardens is where they will be done.
Family Assistance Office want the entire sum they gave me (over five grand), for 06/07 BACK, because dh hasn't put in a tax return for that year yet. He has a list of excuses a mile long for why it isn't done. i dont' know what i can say to get him to do it. I can't do it, or ask an accountant to do it, cos i don't have the group certificate and superannuation documents for that year. otherwise, i would just take those thigns to the nearest accoutnatnt and just say Please do this pronto to get me out of trouble with centrelink etc. and pay for it to be done. This huge debt is in MY name, because of something dh did not do. he's supposedly been wroking on his tax for eight months now!!!
Tara mate if you need to phone or vent or scream or cry its okay. I hope you are okay. I found the first year with Jovie to be really hard. Having two.
We still own our house in Brissy.... I wonder if its still okay...
we've had a lot of rain, thunder, lightning, winds but we're all safe...i would assume v is flooded in...
thanks christy, thanks to the storm last night i switched around my bedtime routine which worked a treat, so much less stressful.
bbl...a pooing baby on my lap and a lovely toddler pulliung my handbag apart. typing one handed aint easy
oh sorry gigi...what happened with the vandals? i missed that. good job on the photographer...poo about dh's tax return!
i'm not flooded in yet. the creek is very high, and if we get more storms as they are predicting, good chance that we will be. oh well. i'm getting used to it now.
Kim...You are so lucky having a boy after 2 girls!!! I wouldnt mind having another bub and I would love a girl but the odds arnt to favourable..after 2 boys!!! did you guys try anything like timing intercourse etc to tip the odds??? Im tracking my cycle as we are using natural family plannng. I have been looking at the shettles method etc but there are a couple of conflicting theories....has anyone tried any of these????
Im taking Zander to lollipops playland for his birthday next friday and I have ordered him a bob the builder birthday cake..we wont be having a party as we dont really know any other kids, my parents are coming up from brisbane for his birthday and we will be going to the aquarium and to magnetic island together so that should be fun.
Anyway its been getting really warm and muggy here...over 30deg during the day and an overnight low of 26.....so my daily mission is to keep everyone cool and make sure the boys are having enough fluid..better go hope everyone is doing ok..bye for now
Not good about the vandals Gigi...little buggers arent they. Poor Bilby being pulled by the arm..is she ok now?
Glad your not flooded in (yet) V!
Nicola we did gender sway for a boy this time and was a bit worried id muddled the timing up....but i guess i was spot on!! My GP says its easier to get a girl then it is a boy.....so give it a go, can only end up with a 3rd DS! I was actually told at 19 weeks i was having a girl....then at 21 weeks a boy!
AFM....just got home fromt he hospital...im GD free!! Yeehaw! Bub going well...the OB said from feeling around bub is going to be small....(ill believe it on D day...), still head down and engaged. Asked about delayed cord clamping and she was impressed i was even considering it!
Gigi....i dont understand why your the one copping it when its DH that hasnt done the return....hmm but then again i know Centrelink is in my name....so i guess the burden falls to me if we over estimate and have to pay them money back too. Far out babe...id be doing what Nicola said, speak to Centrelink and see how they can help....how do they expect YOU to pay somethign back if you dont work and earn the money (is DH working...did he get that job ages back?).
I so know that feeling of not knowing what to do. Its how I felt before I left the exH. I was desperately unhappy, but felt so incredibly guilty about taking the kids away from their father. In the end it was me ending up in hospital that pushed my decision. His complete lack of ability to support me in a time when I needed support more then I had ever needed was the clincher. He also ended up giving me a centrelink debt, because he lied, and said that he had the kids for a certain amount of time when he didnt. for me to prove otherwise required more energy then I had, we were at court already regarding visitation, so I let it go. I discussed with centrelink that I was unable to pay back the amount that they had set, and we negotiated a lesser amount per fortnight.
Would your DP go to counselling? sometimes having that third person can lend some objectivity to the situation and can help him to HEAR what you are saying. I wish I could say something to make it better hun. thinking of you
Gigi hugs for you
I know that spiralling out of control feeling when debts and bills start to pile up and there is no way out... I have no suggestion re leaving DH except this:
as most of you know my childhood was a constant spiral of debt and debtors, alcoholism and abuse in all forms and I always remember thinking about my mum's actions -why the hell do you just not leave. When we were adults and she finally left him after 30 years of crap I asked her why she took so long. Her answer was that she was scared that if she left him it would only be with her clothes and her 5 children and nothing else. No car, fridge, beds etc. She also said in hindsight if only she knew there were people and places out there who help women in this position - regardless of the situation being alcoholism, abuse, neglect, bankruptcy etc. - if only she was more aware and proactive.... As an adult I only wish she had have left years and years earlier so that SHE had more quality life than she did. Kids survive and adapt, you need to think about you.
Hmmmm regarding the debt ring centrelink and talk to them, even better go to a family service office and they can lay it on the table for you and you can open the dialogue with a view to resolution.
Big hugs hun xxx
Gigi - big big hugs to you. I agree with what the girls have said so far and i'm glad that you feel you can turn to us. This ol' internet thing really is a lifeline at times.
I agree, talk to centrelink..they are meant to be there to help!
I know you said this debt isnt your fault, but i'm pretty sure when DH had trouble with tax debt a few years ago (young and naive lol - we just sold his car to pay it off - a stupid decision in the end!) anyways, he since found out that he could pay the debt back over time - he didnt have to pay it out as a lump sum. and i know the amount wasnt much. it was an $8000 debt that he could pay back at $6 a week or something stupid like that. I'm not saying that i think you should have to pay it back - but if it comes down to the wire thats always something you can look into.
I also agree with nelly. There's no point in staying for the sake of bilby if the quality of life is crap. if you are constantly arguing then thats not a good environment at all for her.
I guess it comes down to - do you feel that YOU want to put the effort in? do YOU want to make it work with DH?
It's worth reading 'men are from mars, women are from venus'. we are COMPLETELY different species. I guarantee your DH's non-commital attitude towards this debt is because he feels guilty and embarrassed for putting you in this situation. In all honesty - he probably doesnt know what to do about it and feels stuck.
I'm not making excuses for his behaviour - just offering possible reasons.
Anyway, hope thats of some help
Oh re: cord clamping. I wish I had known about it! I probably should have done a bit more research LOL oh well...i guess i did my best. no drugs and waterbirths have to account for something!!! lmao
(just making myself feel better) hahaha
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