Georgi - I'm thinking of starting with signs for drink and milk. I'm trying to think of what words she'll need first. I think after I've done then for a while I might teach mummy and daddy.
katones - I'm with you.. I can't believe Maya is 12 weeks today!
I had such a bad day yesterday. Sorry long rant to follow:
Yesterday I decided that I wanted to get out of the house for a bit. DH has been wanting to visit his father and show Maya to his father's partner (who just keeps not turning up to anything we organise) so I suggested going to their place. They live in Geelong - an hour or so drive away. Maya slept most of the way there, so at this stage all was good. We arrived at my FILs and she was still sleeping but woke when we got her out of the car. We went into the house and greeted my FIL and when my FIL said hello to Maya she started screaming. And she screamed and screamed and screamed. DH was trying to settle her. And she always settles normally! But she just would not stop screaming. And the scream was awful! I have not heard her like that before! So my brain goes into over drive trying to work out what's wrong. Was it my FIL that set her off? She does cry when she is held by strangers but not when they look at her and she definitely doesn't scream like that. Was she tired? We had gotten her up from her sleep. But again she would never scream like that. Seriously the screaming was horrible and was breaking my heart!
So we decided to go back in the car and drive around and see if that would settle her. Nope. She screamed the whole time!! So we went back to my FILs house and I got her out of the car and took her over to a tree. And she quietened down finally. She was now sobbing but at least she wasn't screaming. So we went back inside my FIL's house and BAM the screaming started up again. And at this point I finally worked out that it was the smell in the house! Before we arrived my FIL had cleaned his entire house with undiluted disinfectant and both DH and I found the smell so overwhelming so I can only imagine it must have been too much for poor Maya. You could smell it from the street even! I took her back outside and again she settled - back to sobbing not screaming.
But what really ****ed me off is that my FIL and his partner kept saying things like "she must have wind" and "oh she must be so difficult!" Both DH and I kept saying over and over and over again that she's never been like that before and it must be the disinfectant smell! But they didn't believe us. And I am so sick of people not believing me! As soon as Maya behaves out of the norm people think it must be wind or they think she's always like that. And when I tell them it's not normal for her they don't listen to me!
What really really ****ed me off is that when I was outside with Maya calming down finally my FIL's partner suddenly grabbed Maya off me!! I am not kidding. She just took Maya out of my arms! And then she wouldn't give Maya back and Maya started crying again because she doesn't like strangers. And what's even worse she took Maya back inside the house because they didn't believe me that the house was where the problem was!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So Maya started screaming again!!!!!! I basically chased my FIL's partner into the house and yelled at her to give me back Maya. I took Maya back outside and went into the car and I told DH we were going. We took off and Maya vomited - I mean there was a serious amount of food coming out and she was making awful noises bringing it up. By this stage I thought OMG she's so sick. We pulled over and I fed her. She calmed right down and fell asleep straight away. Then woke up near home and was back to her normal self. And she's been fine ever since. In some ways I think how on earth could the smell/fumes of disinfectant cause that much pain for her but I am always second guessing myself and what else could it be! After this experience I've realised I need to start trusting my instincts more.
Though I feel like such a bad mum at the moment. How could I have let Maya go into that house three times when it was obvious something was setting her off in that house. And how could I have let someone grab her from my arms?!
Tanya you are not a bad mummy, how were you suppose to know what was wrong straight away but you did work it out and that what makes you a good mummy. As for this woman grabbing Maya, she had no right to do this and you will know next time you are around her to stay well clear. Maybe get DH to talk to FIL about his partners behaviour regarding this and tell him that it is not on and that it will not be tolerated. Big
Tanya - your not a bad mummy. I know when Mia is screaming like that your mind is racing a million miles an hour. PIL's really **** me coz of this reason, they think they can just jump in and tell u what to do and how to do it. Stand your ground sweety, she is YOUR daughter. Dont worry about the spew thing, Mia does the same thing after she has been screaming and she calms down a little. You did the right thing by giving her a feed and that just goes to show how well u know ur baby girl and how much of a fantastic mummy u are! big hugs sweety xoxoxo
Amanda - Thanks. I did talk to DH last night and told him I don't want his father's partner near Maya again. I don't really like her anyway and this latest incident has just made me dislike her even more. I still can't believe that she took Maya from me.. but I also don't really know how it happened or why I didn't stop her. I thought she was pulling Maya's top down (which was up near her head) but then she grabbed her and it happened so quick! I'll definitely stay clear of her.
Hollye - Thanks. My ILs are just driving me crazy lately telling me what's wrong with Maya and comparing her to the other children in the family, when they don't even know Maya!
Just playing a bit of devils advocate - but I am sure that all the IL's and pain in the a$$ relations have good intentions. I mean, no-one starts out trying just to annoy people and upset babies etc. We don't see ours enough cos of distance so whenever we do I am forever shoving my babies into their arms/laps/faces so they can get to know them in a short time frame.
Tanya - don't panic about the settling honestly. Look if it gets to 6 months and Maya will still only settle with alot of assistance, you can do some gentle comfort self settling teaching then. During the day I give Zander big cuddles and a pat in my arms until his eyes look heavy and put him in the cot. Yep, he goes off then by himself, but with my DD - I won't go into it too much, but she was hard work, and remained so until she was 3. I still gave her a bottle up to 18 months overnight occasionally cos I just didn't know what else to do!!! and was too tired to deal with the cryng and continual waking overnight, espeically with DH away. It is all good now (mostly) - hard to see beyond what is happening in the moment I know.
Maybe your MIL thought she was helping by taking Maya as you were upset too which can make Maya upset even more etc - but if you asked to give her back, well, I don't think anyone can explain that one ..
Something can be said for the all experts saying some people keep their houses "too clean" for babies - better they are exposed to some dirt and dust etc for their immune system instead of cleaning chemicals. I definitely practice that
Quick Personals ...
Georgi - relieved to hear your results, but you must be so pssd about the mastitis again.
Hollye - damn girl you make me feel so old - I couldn't dream of having had a baby when I was nearly 21! I was no where near ready or mature enough at that..
katones - so Jack is doing ok again with his bottles??
teruteru - when you say habit do you mean illegal stuff or alcohol? I am assuming the naughty stuff when you said a friend offered. You are doing so well to stay strong, but remember the most important thing is that Dragon is safe and you are all happy.
PP - spew - I had enough with DD - she would spew morning noon and night - no wonder she hardly put on weight. I have hardly used a bib so far with Zander and believe me I TOTally appreciate it I remember going to a funeral with DD and taking 6 bibs thinking for sure that would be enough for 2 hours - nope, at the wake I had to ask for a tea towel I could take home with me and wash - she was so disgusting. I was so paranoid when someone wanted to hold her. Zander has an occasionally teensy chuck and that is it - my hair is loving him for it!!
belfie - hope you are having a lovely time in Tassie
I lasted until 11.15 NYE - not too bad I thought considering I have usually had and hours sleep by then. I kicked our visitors out at 10 cos my kids were exhausted, Riley already in but my party girl was in for the long haul and their kids are a bit older.
My darling boy turns 6 on 01/02 so I am thinking of what to do - I always shy away from home parties at that time of year cos it is usually very hot. Maybe Intencity - that is not too badly priced ... hmm... going off to research.
thanks Sami. I am not sure if i can cut out dairy. its too hard lol but i will wait out the spew.
Ashley never spewed AT ALL.. they are such different babies.
Tanya - Woohoo on getting out! how long is the drive. Have you got some classical music in the car?
i find Ethan is out like a light to Majors for Minors cd i have!
Sorry long rant to follow:
- hard to see beyond what is happening in the moment I know. 
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