Babies Born September 2006 #92

[Nelle]

Friday night? Sounds like a plan! Whether things go to plan, well we'll see, but I'll try not to forget!

[*Nessa*]

I honestly dont know if i am up for a chat. will see how i go tomorrow.

I am really really ready just to leave this f@#$%^& house. I have had it with the girls and DH. Im sorry but I have also had it with being PG. all i seem to do around home is sacrafice everything. I am sick of giving and having every last bit drained from me.
I am sick of hearing constant whinging from the girls when they arent allowed to do what htey want. I am sick of being a domesticated service. I really have no idea why i wanted to have a family atm.

[Nelle]

Any way you can get some time out Ness? Explain it to your dh in terms of recharging your batteries? If your batteries aren't charged, you can't do the job you're supposed to be doing. But if you can take a short break, and refuel, then you'll come back feeling a lot better and more positive - will he understand that?

[maz]

Im in on the msn chat if I can get it to work on my computer.

Im back in the land of the living girls...god I missed you all and found it really hard to get my head aorund how to tell you what was going on....I think it was harder with you guys cause we have all know each other pre our bubs and it was just so scarey.

On sunday 27th of jan I noticed that Mateuaz has a twitch in his face.....h wouldnt take the boobie which he loves and was really misserble. also noticed he was a funny colour (greyish almost) rang the hospital at 2.30am after he started breathing really funny and going blue. Ambulance came and of we went to emergency. He had a lumba puncture at 10am that morning and he was rushed to the Mercy hospital and I followed by car. He had an MRI which showed blood clots and sweling to his prain. Was told he would need surgery to remove them, then it changed to putting coils un through his leg to his brain. Was sent to the Royal Childrens were it was discovered that he also had 2 bad infectins, one being stafe and I cant remember the other one. Had another MRI and lumba last weekend and I asked the doctors not to tell me the results on my birthday as i didnt want to make the discission of medication that could kill him on it. So sunday last week was cr@p for me. then I found a 5c piece ont he ground and put it over his cot monday and good news after good news came in. The cloths had not grown and the virsus were vertually gone. Nothing grew ont he bloods that they took from him so with a little observation, my baby boy came home on wednesday with me.
Bad news is, he has recieved brain damage to his white secton of the brain which effects his muscles and eye control.....so he now has cerabel palsey. Alls good, Im very hapy my little man is home with me, he smiles and looks up at me when I talk to him. He is such a boobie monster and I got the nurses all to help me maintain my supply through this. The nurses at the Royal Childrens were fantastic and realy helped me to stay positive and focussed on everything. Im think by bfing him the whole time that it helped me stay sane and helped 'us' be strong for each other.

So girls I hope that you understand why I couldnt come and tell you about it...it has been an extremely hard and emotinal 10 days for me. Thank you for all your thoughts and prays.

Now enough of my *****........

how is everyone???? please Ihave missed so much please fill me in

[*Nessa*]

i really dont know nelle.

Im seriously not meaning to whinge but im just not coping, have no idea how i am meant to cope with 3 as well. I have no idea if its the hormones or my depression but I seriuosly have just been crying all day.
Im not doing this for sympathy or anything I just really am ready to give up and walk away from it all.


I know Annika is just trying to tell me something but i just feel so helpless thati cant figure out why she is like this atm. Teleah is really wearing my patience thin and just does not let anything go.

[*Nessa*]

And i really know i shouldnt whinge and i should appreciate everything i have

and compared to what you have been through Maz my life is a walk in the park.

I just hate these highs and lows i get.

Maz- i just wish i had 1/10th of your strength hun you amaze me.

[Nelle]

No no Ness, everyone, no matter what their situation, has their good and bad days - I really reckon you should try and grab an afternoon off though - maybe organise an agreement with your dh where you get an arvo to yourself, and he gets one to himself? And if you think it's a mental health thing, go see your psych and nip it in the bud perhaps?

Maz, seeing it all like that sure shows what a ride you've been on! I watched Susie Maroney (is that her name? The long distance swimmer?) on Enough Rope awhile ago, and did you know that she and her twin brother (who was a marathon runner) were born with Cerebal Palsy? I don't know how severe Mat's is, can you even tell this early? But thought that might be a hopeful little fact for you to know.

I've got a bandaid on my butt! The dr gave me a penicillin injection today, cos he's worried I'm not getting better quick enough. I'm so relieved, I thought he'd just pat me on the back and say there there, these things take time, and then I'd have to hold him hostage til he did something. But he took me very seriously, and took pity on me when I said I wasn't coping or functioning cos I felt so crap - first time ever a dr's listened to me I reckon! Have to have another injection tomorrow though - they're a bit hurty! But I'll do whatever it takes to get better!

[Cougar]

hi girls

nessa..i am sorry you are going through all this sh** atm, have you got family that can take the girls for a little while, so you can rest and have some quality time with dh, and you can sort things out without the distarction of the girls...i can send jessica my 15yo daughter over, she is a fantastic babysitter

maz..nice to see you back, i must admit the night i actaully read the post about mat, i could not sleep for a few nights as i was so worried for you all, so i couldnt imagine what you were going through, im so pleased you guys are home, and i dont know much about cerably palsy (sp) but i really pray that its noyt to bad for little mat, you are such a strong waman..i applaud you for that.

nelle..re: potty...caity has been using it for a couple of months now, and we have had sucess everyday i put her on, i started by putting her on it as soon as she was undressed for the bath, and straight after it as well, first sitting was poo, next was wee, then poo...etc..the only problamn is she picks the potty up after it very proud, and wanting to play with it..she is very cluey, when it comes to her bodily functions.

hi evryone..

caity had her first day at "SCHOOL" today, and she went great, she is very outgoing, and couldnt give a sh** that i wasnt there....craig surprised me with a day out and took me out for lunch...i think someone had a guilty concencious( good a cant spell)...and i feel fantastic now, just one day out with both of us having quality time, was something we both needed, so im a happy girl now

[*Nessa*]

Chrissy- glad you had a great day

you know what makes me feel so bad about feeling like i have had ebough is i do get time to myself. The girls go to daycare on a tuesday all day. The thing is most tuesdays i spend doing the house work and doing all the stuff that is much easier to do with out children, bills etc.
Then when thats all done i have been spending the day trying to make some extra $$ cause we are so broke.

So i guess even though its kid free time its not me time, its household time. IYKWIM

[Nelle]

Well, maybe you just need to get strict - the housework can wait an extra hour or so on Tuesday while you take a walk, have a bath, or some other purely 'you' activity, right? Housework's pretty patient like that. Sounds like it might be helpful to get a bit of 'you' time?

[Cougar]

yes totally agree with nelle, housework can wait, my housework always waits for me, my house is always a mess, but i dont really care, my housework day is saturday, so everyone can pitch in and help...put your feet up and just rest all day tuesday

[Visitor7]

maz - that's wonderful news that you are all home now. And I agree with everyone else, you are such a strong woman. Please don't feel the need to apologise for not having the time to fill us all in on what was happening. You were in our thoughts day and night while he was in hospital. The most important thing is that he's got his health, and you're all home. I bet the kids were estatic to have you home, and Jed too!!
And a huge congratulations on your breastfeeding relationship. Another reason why you're a champ! Keep up the good work.

nessa - I agree with Nelle, leave the housework. I know it's awful having a messy house, or not having something done. But when it gets to this point, you need to think about number one. You.

chrissy - woohoo on Caity having a fun day at school!! Nina loves going to school each week. She even calls it that.

nelle - we occassionally put Nina on the potty, which sometimes is a success, other times is a complete disaster! She's starting to realise when she needs to wee, cause she'll say 'wee' and hold herself. And if she's done a poo somewhere during nappy free time she'll come racing to find one of us, and take us there and say 'oh o'.

We've had a huge week or two lately. My work has had to lay me off as from tomorrow as the receptionist who is on maternity leave is coming back, but didn't want to go back to doing reception, so they're putting her in my spot. Bit of a bummer, but oh well. Not much I can do about it.
Nina is going really well. She has dropped her day sleeps now, so the days are very long. We found that if she had a day sleep, she would wake at night. If she didn't have a day sleep, she'd sleep through. So I'd rather that she slept through at night.
Everything else is going just dandy. Heath's new job is going great. He's working really long hours, but it pays off on pay day.
Gotta run, Nina is demanding my attention! What's new!!!

[lilima]

Ness - Considering that you pregnant, and have some other problems in regard to how you are feeling, I think that you are doing wonderfully. It sounds like you need a well deserved rest. You are heavily pregnant, so you need to give yourself a break. Tell Dh to have the girls for a while, or even better get him to take them out, so you can have a relax at home by yourself.

Maz - You are a pillar of strength. If only I was half the person you are. I am praying the CP is fairly minimal. If you need help with where to go for support with CP, please let me know, and I can help you out.

I am still sick. I am not going to go to work tomorrow. I have been very teary today. J has been an Angel. But my SIL just told us that we can't stay with her any more in London. The whole idea of going was because she wanted us to go, and she wanted us to be with her. Now she is saying no. We cant really afford to go, and pay for accom for a month. So not sure what we will do. I want to cancel the trip, as I am already having anxiety attacks about how I will cope with J on the plane, then a jetlaged baby. I have told DH to go by himself, I just want to curl up into a ball and forget about everything for a while. - Hey ness - we make a great pair at the moment don't we??!!!

ETA - Jodi I was wondering where you were! Bummer about the job. Wow! No day sleep. I would go barney if I didn't get that short break during the day!

[Nelle]

Whaaaaat? Meg that's insane - what is the reason for your trip to London? I know we couldn't afford the cost of a month's accomm! Was it an occasion, or just a lovely holiday? Cos if it's a holiday, I reckon just go somewhere else if you can!

[Freya]

Hey chickies! Just checkin in.

Maz, so glad to see your home with your handsome little man I got your sms, ta for the info I appreciate it. Sorry I didnt answer back, Im lucky if I can scratch myself lately. No need to apologise to us, we were all kept in the loop and we completely understand why you felt that way. Mats really is gorgeous Maz, I love seeing your ticker pic, makes me smile!

Jodi, sucky about being laid off. I ditto Meg, if Jett didnt have a rest OR a nap Id be insane by dinnertime.

Meg, sucks your SIL reneg'ed on her offer of accom. Dont blame you for wanting to cancel, I struggle with the idea of taking the kids to the local shops so doing a 24hr flight + toddler would send me screaming into the nearest corner to rock myself lol What does DH think about it?

Ness, all I can say is I understand completely. And your completely normal. I never do housework on Jetts daycare days, I just relax around the house or go out shopping/lunching with my girlfriends.

Nelle, we have a potty but atm all Jett does is sit on it and tbh I cant be tushed pushing the potty training issue with Rips being so young. Im knackered enough as it is. But he has started to recognise when he's wet/poo'd by telling us 'wee wee' or 'poo stinky'. Maybe just buy a potty and sit Riv on it before/after bathtime and let him get used to the idea for awhile.

Hi to everyone else!

We're doing ok. Jetts really pushing my limits lately, seems like he saves all his naughtiness for when its just me, him and Rips. He spends more time in his room on time out than with us but I just dont know what to do other than that (Im trying really hard not to smack, or save it for the really bad stuff). Ripley is ok, still v. unsettled and keeping me tired. Had our MCHN appt on wednesday and he has grown heaps. He weighs in at 4895g and 54.5cm long, thats a 1.5kg/4.5cm growth in 3 weeks The nurse was very impressed and very sympathetic as she said he must be feeding every 1-2hrs to have gained so much in so little time, no wonder Im so tired. I literally spend every day feeling like Im going to collapse or fall asleep at any second. We're booked in to sleep school on March 4th to see if they can help us any with Rips unsettledness. I feel so bad because Im so cranky with everyone My saving grace is that the inlaws are coming on March 3rd for 4 weeks so I will have some of the pressure (housework, kids, no time for naps) eased up on me then. Plus we're going on holidays to Melb for the long weekend to have some beach time and take J to the zoo/aquarium so should be fun.

I am keeping track of you all I just dont get much time to post.

[lilima]

AnnaT - Can you get a housecleaner to take the pressure off a bit? I am sure jett is just pushing his limits, as he knows that you time with him is now divided.

Nelle - SHE was the one that wanted us to go on the trip. The whole idea of going was to see her, as she really sooked about how we haven't been to see her. Then its like - oh by the way, my lease on my flat runs out in April, and i am not bothering to renew it as i am going travelling in May, so you can't stay with me as I am going to stay in a Hostel. WTF! Why invite us, and tell us we can stay then say no. - Sorry to sound aggressive here, but there are a few people I just want to tell to %#)* off at the moment, and she is one of them!

[ShootingStar]

Just wanted to pop in and say Maz, glad to see you and the little spunky monkey are home safe and sound. Hey there have been so many miracles in this world and no doubt you have one in Mateauz. Hes definately a little fighter. Just take care of you ok and that little angel.. :hugs:

[Freya]

Just adding Ive put some new pics in my gallery for those interested