Babies born~February 16th-28th 2009 #12

[shellbell3]

ooh thats a good tip with the boy nighttime nappies. We have tuumy sleeper too.

OP- hope you told them to bring there own wraps next time! Lol, you poor thing, I reakon have a nap in your lunch time! Pregnancy, work and awake babies aren't a good combination.

Meg- thats great u found new playgroup, I finally gave up my mums group, sad as I'd been going for over 3 years but I was always the outsider, didn't fit in, they were nice enough but all close with each other so in the end I had enough. Plus times were crap too, kept making it later and later, 3:30 it was on at! I start bathing and cooking dinner at 4;30.

Olive- how did your night go? I saw your other thread. How does she go about eating if your not there? Does she eat better if she knows booby not around?

I've been offered to look after a nearly 2 year old one day week, prolly will do it, extra $$ will be nice, they'll drop him here at 7:30 and pick up 5-5:30 he loves playing with the girls so no probs there. Just thinking on how much should ask for, someone in thread I started said $8-10 hour so was roughly what we thought, was gonna ask maybe $80 for the day. I'll be feeding him, they'll supply nappies. Will be nice that cash in hand every week for doing what I'd be doing anyway but with one extra.

[~Kaz~]

Hi girls!!

Shell - sounds great!! Extra money is always nice.

lilima - I'm really glad you've moved into a nicer group. I remember your threads from a while ago about how cliquey and weird the other mum's were. No idea about the work but if it were me, I'd go for what challenges me and interests me, even if the hours aren't quite right.

OP, Olive, Heaven and anyone else with a frequent waking bub

We have nightweaned DS. Not sure we followed Jay Gordon to the letter, in that I wasn't counting days or anything. One night he went a longer stretch and DP said he'd settle him and so without really meaning to, we started a few days earlier than planned. DS never fed to sleep but was doing what miss M does and using the feed to settle himself back down. I had been feeding him 2 hourly most of the time and I was really struggling. Something had to give cause I was getting worried about my mental state and so was DP. I just have to say that DP is AWESOME cause he did all the settling for about a week!! Then we had another tooth cut, then the 12 month immunisation so a few days after that and he started waking again at all hours and taking ages (like hours) to settle. He was doing what Miss I is for OP - just wanting to be held and screaming when put back in his cot. DP resorted to driving him round in the car in the middle of the night a couple of times. We've had both sets of grandparents staying seperately in the past week, there's been parties, big outing days, time in daycare. It's all happening for him. If I'd had more choice, I would have spaced out the weaning, daycare and immunisation but didn't want to delay immunisation cause he's going into care, can't delay care cause I'm going back to work and needed to wean him cause I wasn't functioning well with all the wake ups and need to be back on deck to go back to work. Damn work!! So wish I didn't have to go, look at the issues it's caused already!!

A few nights ago we put a mattress on the floor so now when he wakes and won't resettle with cuddles, he and I sleep on the mattress. It seems to be working in that we're getting slightly more sleep. Last night we got a 5.5 hour stretch before he woke and wouldn't resettle so we slept together in his room between about 5:30am and 7:45am. Hopefully that's a short term thing while the immunisation works it's way back out of his system.

Oh and he dropped his day feeds too in amongst all of that so now we only feed twice a day - 11pm and 6am (approx). Feel a bit sad but at least he's dropped them in his own time and wasn't forced by my return to work. Also, he had bitten me and feeding was very painful for a while there so I think he's been wanting to drop them for a while and I wasn't listening.

Nai - I've tried the cow's milk before bed after your post but DS doesn't like it and spills it everywhere!! Your DD is giving you some great stretches overnight!
Bellabambina - love the new username!! Can't wait to see your avvy when it's up! Two weeks will be gone before you know it and you'll be on holidays! How is DD going in care?

[Olive]

kaz awesome work with the weaning!!!! wooohoooo!! and a huge pat on the back for your DH! the more i night wean M th emore she feeds duriong the day but having said taht i havnt fed during the night for a week now! last night she took 40 mins to resettle so not bad!!
we also dont like cows milk though she did drink some just before!

[OceanPrincess]

Kaz, that sounds like you guys are really getting somewhere with the night weaning!!! Well done, go DP! What a star he has been for you

We don't have a spare mattress... or I think I would have slept on the floor in her room a few times too, good idea! And as Det keeps saying, you do what works for you!

Miss I bit me twice this morning, it is nasty. I think it was unintentional though - she was so exhausted after her early wake up.

Well done.

Shell - I'd go for it too! $80 sounds reasonable!

PS - Kaz - who is Bellabambina, what have I missed??

[~Kaz~]

Yay Olive! 40 mins isn't so bad to resettle. I was worried DS would feed more during the day to make up for the night and also to make up for the hours in care but I really think he was ready to drop the day feeds anyway. We will continue to persevere with cows milk here too. I am slightly worried that he's dropped the b'feeds and not picked up the cow's milk but as with everything else, I have to trust him to know best what he needs. They're really big feeds at 11 and 6 so maybe he's just condensed lots of little ones into two big ones? My CFHN said they "should" be having about 600ml of milk or equivalent of dairy per day. Don't know how they get that number and it's meaningless since we can't measure breastmilk feeds anyway!!

ETA - snap OP!! BellaBambina is Alibaby!! I was reading back through the thread and she seems to have had a name change. Before we moved the spare mattress I spent a night squished onto his cot mattress on the floor cause I was feeling sick and needed to lie down and was desperate!! Wasn't doing that one again! Do you have any family or friends that could lend you a mattress for a little while?

[OceanPrincess]

Ahhhh Alibaby, nice! I get so confused... I blame baby brain and sleep deprivation

Yeh Kaz I agree, you cannot measure his BF so just listen to your instincts! Miss I is only having 2 BFs a day, has been since about 11mths, so who knows exactly how much she gets?

I also couldn't tell you how much cow's milk she has - some days a few sips, some days a few sippy cups! But dunno how much is in a sippy cup!!! They are all different, where do these rules come from?

[AliBaby]

Kaz-That is fantastic! I am so happy for you and DP and J as it is important that everyone is gettign sleep and is happy and healthy. I did the mattress on the floor thing when I night weaned DD and it worked for us. I think it was a few weeks but I got used to it and she got used to being in her room and not coming into mine. I am still yet to do immunisations. Might try this arvo after I pick DD up from CC or maybe tomorrow. CC is going great for DD. She is loving it. She doesnt sleep much though. 45min yesterday so when I got home she was grizzly so I put her to bed with a bottle at 5pm and she stayed asleep!!! I actually went in at 11pm to change her nappy (did it in her cot) and she went back to sleep until 7pm this morning so CC is working wonders for her night time sleep! Hope it does the same for J.

Lilima- I was so happy when I read you have found a great play/mums group. I have been very lucky with a wonderful group with no clicks which is great considering there is probably an age range of about 15 years between me being the youngest and the oldest mum. We have just started to organise ours to turn into a playgroup and invite other mums as well.

OP- It sounds like such a juggling act at the moment with Miss I, work, pregnancy, lack of sleep. My heart goes out to you. You can start counting down to maternity leave soon!

Shell- I think what you want to ask sounds fair esp as you are providing all the food and cooking. Great for the extra cash though!

Olive- Sounds liek some major improvements on the night front. Hope the day feeding settles for you.

AFM- DD in CC today and I am not at work so have doen so much cleaning today! Even vaccumed the car that was filled with Saltanas everywhere! LOL! Feels strange without DD here though. You may have seen my other thread on breakables after incident with MIL on Monday. Seems MIL has been speaking to SIL and SIL spoke to DP and of course DP spoke to me! SIL seems to think its my fault for even having a snowglobe for DD but has missed the entire part about it being up hight out of DD's reach and MIL putting it on the ground for her to play with! I am then apparently an overprotective parent! So easy for someone to judge who doesnt have children! pffftt! I actually think I am quite a relaxed parent but maybe because I dont wnat my child playing with a glass object or pulling everything out of kitchen cupboards makes me uptight! At least DP stuck up for me and we are on the same page with how we want to parent DD.

Kaz spotted my new username! It means beautiful little girl(referring to my DD not me)! But you girls can still call me Ali. Have put in for an avvy so will soon see what it looks like when it arrives.

to all those who I missed

ETA- You girls posted when I was typing.
OP- Its me AliBaby! I bought a foam mattress from Fantastic for $40. It lives folded under our spare bed now. It was a very good investment at the time.
Kaz- I read somewhere about the dairy before. I will try and find it.

[OceanPrincess]

... You can start counting down to maternity leave soon!

Haha... LOL... ... who says I'm not already?

Nice username Ali, love it What are you going to do when you have a boy next??

Can't wait to see your new avvy! I miss mine

Glad to hear CC is working out so well for you! Maybe that's what I need to try with Miss I

Thanks for the mattress tip... we actually need a proper one for DD's "big girl" bed and also one for underneath (we will buy a proper trundle bed when we can afford it) - so the FF $40 mattress sounds perfect for underneath her new bed! Might go check it out!

[Malyna]

OP - still have a night waker - Alex will sleep from 8-12 or 1am then wakes every 2 hours or so until 6am or sometimes 8am. Still going to sleep on the boob, although for the last three nights he's flaked on the lounge (which is where he is at the moment).

ali - llike the new username

Sorry have forgotten everything else - had problems with BB - didn't get any email notifications of new posts, and had probs logging on and got stuck into editing my novel (added another 10 pages)

I use nature care nappies at night for Alex - he doesn't wet through them, although some mornings they are hanging off him - LOL.

I got a latex foam mattress from clarks for 110$ - it's nice and thick, so your hips don't go through it. I've been sleeping on it for months now.. sigh.. one day I'll get back in the big bed... LOL

12 mth check up and Alex is still just under 9kg and he's still in 00 pants!! I had to move him up in his vests to 0 because the 00 wouldn't fit over his head!!

[Olive]

must.go.to.bed....!

just a quickie,will do persies inthe morning,M has stirred twice already, not enough for me to go in but still. hope the rest of the night is better.
M is saying 'done' when shes finished eating!! tis very cute!

night everyone~!

[Kailani]

Hi all,

Don't get a lot of time to check out the threads these days - lectures, reading & studying, assignments left, right, and centre. Not to mention L...lol

Hope you're all well

Just a quick update - nothing new here! Hehe. Still same old...still bfing, infact he is more into it than ever before. He constantly pulls at my top and wants a feed. He has even added an extra feed He is now feeding immediately after waking in the morning while we're in bed. He's never had a feed before breakfast until now! We are also still feeding all throughout the night and I feed him to sleep!! Won't be weening whatsoever any time soon. Doesn't bother me really.

I have a phone consultation with the Queen Elizabeth Centre on Monday...I don't even know what our problems are and if there are even problems at all?? Maybe I'm just making such simple things into problems. I need to decide if L sleeping through is really a priority for me, if the tantrums are really that big a deal, if the needing to be fed to sleep is such a problem, if the cosleeping is a problem, the wanting bbs all the time, if the bad behaviour at meal times is an issue or a phase, the total lack of routine no matter how much I try and persist, every day is different - is that a problem? Yes I wish he'd sleep through the night and self settle but is it that big a deal that I should seek professional help and take him out of his comfort zone into a sleep school?? I feel it's selfish of me to try and force independence upon him just to give myself more time to do stuff, have longer and less disturbed sleep, have my bed back, have more time with dp, etc...and it's only a baby's instinct to want all these comfort things and want to be close to me. Of course he wants to be with his mummy 24/7, it's only natural. And like I keep telling myself, surely he won't be like this in 20 years time! Hmmm I am really in two minds about it

Okay enough blabber from me!!! Hopefully I'll get on here tomorrow to catch up properly xox

[OceanPrincess]

Hi all,

Holly - nice to hear from you! Also nice to hear you sounding a little more positive, well at least that you are taking a step back and trying to assess your situation and put it in the right perspective, if that makes sense. I reckon you should still have the phone consult and maybe even still book in with them for the residential bit - the waiting is the worst part and you can always cancel if you do decide you are happy to roll with it a bit longer.

By the way - I don't think you're being selfish or trying to force independence on him... you are right, absolutely, he will not be like this in 20 years! It is just a question of how you and DP are coping with his current behaviour - sounds like you are doing ok right now, so maybe you do want to just go with it for a while longer. But I'd still say talk to the QEC, see what they say.

How's school going??

Olive - how was the rest of your night? Hope DD slept a little better. So cute about saying "Done"! Miss I has started saying "yum yum yum yum yum" while she is eating. Very cute!

Malyna - glad to hear (in a selfish way) I'm not the only one with a night waker! But you sound like you are dealing well with it. I think I need to sort out DD's new mattresses and get that all happening, it'd be so much easier than sitting on the floor or dragging a chair in, as I have been doing.

How's everyone else going today?

AFU: had tea at my parent's house then I went to a friend's place, DH had DD, apparently she settled off to sleep well (exhausted after her 4am wake up no doubt) and stayed asleep all the way home and into the cot... then about midnight she woke up yelling and crying, so in I went, she had a massive drink of water and went straight back to sleep, then awake at 6.30am. So that isn't too bad.

The only sour note was when DH said "You're not going to like this but I think you should wean her onto a cup of milk in the mornings". To which I replied "you're right, I don't like that, and I am not weaning her".

Apparently he doesn't like the fact that she wakes up and all she wants is BB, he tries to distract her but she is just grumpy until she gets BB. This morning I was drying my hair and wanted to finish, so he was trying to keep her occupied and she cracked it, so from this he says its "too hard" for him to help out in the mornings when I am busy and can't feed her and I should wean her.

So now I am off to do some research on the benefits of BF beyond 12 mths...

[Malyna]

holly - u sound really busy.

OP - u go girl with BF beyond 12 mths. DH's are funny aren't they? (in that non-humourous way that gets under our skins).


What are you girls doing to get your bubs out and meeting other toddlers?

[~Kaz~]

Hey girls, rough night here - he woke every hour or two. Earlier in the evening he was resettling himself by himself but then he needed help and then at 4:30am I gave up and we slept on the mattress but he was still really unsettled and kept losing the dummy and waking and wriggling. I have not slept well

Kailani - I have no advice hun but I have been right where you are - wondering if I'm being selfish or expecting too much and then having a few good days and feeling fine about everything then a rough patch and feeling like I can't cope anymore. It seems to be motherhood (at least my experience of it) interacting with how much sleep I've had the night before. I agree with OP - I'd do the consult, book in and get as much info as you can and then just see how you feel when your spot comes up. You can always not go or go and try for a day or two and leave early or go and see what they say and then only do what you're comfortable with anyway. It's so hard isn't it? Are you in your new house yet?
Bella - Fantastic that DD is doing so well in CC and that sleep she did was awesome!! I would die of shock if DS did that
OP - Check out a website called kellymom for info and research on breast feeding past 12 months. Lots of great info there.
Malyna - Yay on more editing and more pages! DS would be in 00 pants too if he had a sposie on. I've had the same issue with his head with tops too. With socialisation, he is in CC three days a week, does swimming one morning a week (well, 30mins!) and mum's group on one morning for a couple of hours. I'm actually a bit worried there's too much going on for him all of a sudden but if he wasn't in CC I'd probably be looking around for a playgroup. There should be a couple of different ones where you are. Churches often run them too.
Olive - Hope you guys had a good night hun.

[Heaven]

Ok I will just accept I am totally incapable of keeping up with this thread!! lol. It's time to admit it. I always read but am always doing something at the same time so don't get a chance to type a big post!!

So I am not the only one with a baby who doesn't self-settle. I thought there was only a couple of us!! DD has never self-settled, ever, lol. We have had no stages of self-settling or anything.

Umm.....what else did I read!! I have the worse memory!

Holly- Glad to hear you're feeling more positive!
Ali- Love the meaning of the new name!
Olive- Yay for night weaning! Sounds like you're going well!
OP- Sounds like DH is just looking for an excuse not to deal with the difficult behavior, lol, cunning!! But not going to fly!!

Hmm.....meeting other toddlers.....we went to our first play group today!! Haven't been before. It was huge!! There's 30 families!! omg, kids everywhere. I thought DD would be shy but she squirmed down and ran off to play as soon as we got there! lol. She had great fun. I was freaking out a little at the thought of all those kids, some older, and she stuck her fingers in some other kids mouth...ahhh...I always worry she's going to catch something especially seeing as she isn't vaxed yet!! But she had fun and I want to get out more so we are going to be starting vaxing soon, whenever I make the appt!

Night weaning....hmm.....we're taking it VERY slowly!! She is a total booby addict and doesn't take kindly to being denied! lol. But we are gradually getting there, trying to get longer and longer stretches. She's been having some stretches of sleep of 5 hrs lately which is AWESOME for her!!

Well I gtg get some lunch! Hope everyone is well!!

[Nai]

Hi Everyone! Very quick drop in as I am at work and under the pump! Just wanted to say that I put Miss J is cloth last night and she wasn't wet through this morning - bye bye sposies! Unfortunately I have about 60 left but hopefully they will fit her for a while and we can use them when we go away.

[OceanPrincess]

Nai, that's great, congrats on the dry wake up! Must have been nice to not have to change all the bedding this morning

Heaven - lol, I can only keep up on the days that I'm at work - clearly I am not under the pump like Nai

Your playgroup experience sounds good, that's great! Hope she continues to enjoy it. GL with the vax research too - I read your other thread but can't really contribute sorry. But I respect you for doing your research and checking all your options before making a decision.

Kaz - doesn't sound good at all last night. Can you leave him somewhere today and get some sleep? Early night tonight? Something like that?? Hun, hope it gets better again soon and this is just a temporary thing for you guys. It was going so well!!!

On a side note - where do you work? Are you going back soon? Thanks for the website info too, off to check it out now.

Malyna - we have quite a bit on. DD does swimming one morning a week, then we have our Mothers Group, which is about to turn into a playgroup so we will meet some other new mums and bubs, she also goes to another playgroup when my mum look after her on Wednesdays, with my sister and niece, so she's got other bubs there, and then we do a music playgroup on Friday mornings. Sounds like a lot when I write it all down!

If you're looking into playgroups, check out the playgroup Victoria website, or also the music playgroup I do is fantastic, has a bit more structure than a normal playgroup. Its called Mainly Music, they run them all over the world so there's probably one near you somewhere! It has half an hour of play/craft, then half an hour of music - singing, dancing, rhymes, etc, then a short break for morning tea and then a few songs to finish. DD is just starting to really enjoy it - she has been a bit too little before now.

Update on my BF issue: spoke with DH, sent him some info from the ABA that I found, turns out he doesn't want to wean her before she is ready either but he feels useless when I am fluffing around getting ready and all DD wants is a feed. So I agreed that either I'll get up earlier so I can deal with her when she wakes, or as soon as she wakes I stop what I'm doing and feed her, so that he can then look after her while I finish getting ready, without her cracking it.

So that's good!

[shellbell3]

Too much chatter in here!

OP- Glad you worked things out, it does get bit stressful for them when the want to help but feel useless. Are you planning to tandem feed when #2 comes along or ween by then?

Nai- stop slacking off work, lol.

Heaven- 5 hr stretches sound great considering all the trouble you've had with sleep and settling in the past, I can see progress being made. yay. 30 families a huge playgroup! I think I'd get lost, I go better in smaller groups.

Kaz- hope tonight is better, you think could be delayed upset from vax's? i've heard with 12 month ones can be like a week later they react.

Malyna- Emily just has her big sister really, when Ash was that age tho we had mums group and also did gymbaroo. Maybe look at joining a playgroup? Or some activity?

holly- You are sounding quite good. Its all up to you about QEC, we are all different and what we can cope with and handle varies greatly. If you do feel sleep and everything is affecting you in a negative way I'd follow up the help without feeling guilty. Its not selfish of you, your state of health is just as important, you have alot also in your life so gotta do what works for you.

Ali- I'm with you, who give a snow globe for kids to play with! I know I've had broken ones too cause of that reason! I had beautiful ones given as gift to Ash.

I'm going to get into sewing, have always been interested but not had much of a clue on it all so have booked into sewing classes starting next month, and wiped the dust off my sewing machine. Decided to get rid of our desk top computer we never use and set up sewing there, no point getting into it if zI have no where kid free to do it!