Clare, I think it's really important that you acknowledge the emotional trauma and grief from that time, now when you are removed from it. Maybe you're ready for another layer of debriefing...this is not a "wallowing" process, but rather a chance to examine then release what happened, grieve for the loss of that time, so you can gently and gradually make peace with it. :hugs:

MM - I was thinking of one of those vests - biut didn't know where to go...will look at ToysR.

Trill, the main reason we had the bubble with DD1 is because that's what they used at swimming lessons, it provides the right amount of buoyancy while still allowing their face etc to be in the water as they learn to swim...but she was a bit older when she started lessons. I'm pretty sure Missy E has plenty of build in floation aids (lots of blubber like her mum LOL) anyway!