Mel- I hate the rolling of the eyes!! How rude!! I agree, why can't everyone just leave everyone alone to do their own thing!
Maz- Thankyou for your advice! I don't know how to tell them they're being really rude because they do it in a way that is like they're joking but really being mean so if you say something they'll just make you feel stupid like it was just a joke don't be so serious. grr....I hate when ppl are so passive aggressive like that!! And the thing I don't get is that we're all the same religion!! rofl. It's just that maybe I take it more seriously than them?? Hmm...maybe I make them feel insecure. Not my problem!!
Candice- Oh, don't you hate that!! Thankyou for those references, I'm going to go look them up now!
In my family I have buddhists and atheists mostly, and my mum who is a way out there pentecostal christian. I have the most trouble with her unfortunately. She believes that all health problems can be healed by faith and therefore using modern medicine is an indication of a lack of faith.
My sister has a mental illness and suffers from depression and has suicidal tendancies at times. Last time she had an episode, I picked her up and drove her to mum's on the understanding that mum was taking her to hospital. When I left mum's house, mum decided to take her to church for a faith healing instead. It did not work and wow did it cause a fight between her and dad (dad is atheist).
It causes so much trouble, and she is always berating me for not sharing more of my faith with her. Truthfully, I just don't trust her with something so intimate.
Things will get interesting when mum and the rest of the family see's how we introduce religion / faith to our child. We are hoping to have a baby dedication (not a baby baptism because we do not believe in that) and I already know it is going to cause tension. We also only go to church about once a month, I find it is more important to actually live the christian life than to merely attend church. Yet another thing my mother disagrees with!
I think you should stick to your guns and stand up for what you believe in. It is wrong of your family to try and trick you into eating bacon, or doing anything that is against your beliefs. Families should be there to supporty you on this walk, not derail you! Hang in there!
There is so much more I could say but I will leave it at that for the moment...
Candice- it's so hard hey!! Looks like you have some of the same problems! Either you're too religious, or not religious enough?? It's like you have to be just like them or it's not good enough!!
I'm sorry to hear about your sister and also your problems with your mum It can be so frustrating.
We are thinking of having a dedication too because that's what I believe I should too but I'm also wondering what's going to be said about that. My mum had it done for 2 of my siblings and a while ago another family member said something to me about 'when your mother went through that weird stage and didn't get the boys christened properly' So they're going to think I'm a weirdo too then.
On a side note- what churches do dedications? Is it only Baptist? Or is that not even the one.
I go to a baptist church and we only do dedications. Baptisms are done once the person is old enough to make a concious choice for Christ. I am not sure about other denominations to be honest, but my sister (who isn't a believer) got her daughter baptised / christened in an Anglican church.
There was a baby dedication on the fathers day service a few sundays ago. It was lovely, the parents were commiting themselves to raising up their child in the ways of the Lord, the rest of the family promised to help and support the parents to do that, and the church also promised to support the whole family. Overall I was impressed, it was lovely.
You could explain it to the other families members like this: We are doing this in response to these scriptures
Proverbs 22:6
Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.
and
Ephesians 6:4
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
and later when they are older they may choose to be baptised. But explain that these are two seperate events.
I hope this helps! We cannot please all people at all times, so just go with your conviction.
SJ, it is very challenging isn't it! My DH was brought up muslim and I was brought up catholic. His family are not around so I don't haev to deal with them but my family are around and mum and dad are very catholic. He does not observe all muslim things but he does not eat pork products and does not want dd to either. He does not tell me what to eat but I don't have pork products in the house.
My mum is absolutley lovely and would love to take dd to church but will not out of respect for DH's views. But she does not seem to care about feeding dd ham sandwiches and putting bacon in pumpkin soup and feeding taht to both DD and DH. It sort of makes me laugh now as it does not matter how many times I say it she just can't understand it.
We did not have any ceremonies for DD as I jsut thougth it would cause too many issues. I feel like I should try to do more to teach her about our faiths so she can make an informed decision when she is older.
I was baptized and raised Catholic by parents who identify as Catholic (one never goes to mass, the other goes and snoozes in the back row every week )
I have never felt comfortable with christianity or the catholic faith since I was very young. About 10 years ago I began to explore buddhism. You'd think I'd gone and joined a cult for the way my parents ridiculed it and carried on. They really had (still don't have) the faintest idea what it's all about. When our children were born they weren't baptized yet they are still assuming they will be going to catholic schools (they aren't).
I don't discuss my spirituality with them anymore because although they are my parents and I love them, and i know they love me - they don't understand it and have no interest in understanding it.
It's my life, these are mine and my husbands children...we will raise them as we see fit. They've had their turn
anney- people can be really disrespectful!! I remember someone in my family once talking about how they went to a BBQ for something and they couldn't have pork there because of the muslim people and the meat had to be halal. And they were saying: why should we cater for them? Should have just not told them that it was halal anyway, what they don't know won't hurt them! I can't believe how rude this is. They just don't get it at all!! It's not the same as a kid not liking it's veggies so you hide them in it's food!!
tobily- that's what it's like, like you've gone and joined some weird cult!! I feel like you too, I just don't discuss things with them anymore.
There's a great bit in Isaiah - at the end somewhere, really near the end, like chapter 58 onwards, I'm thinking 65 but could be wrong - about doing what's right in the sight of God and not in the sight of man. Decide who you're going to please and do it. If you have studied the Bible and believe that eating pork is wrong then stick to it - show your family the scripture.
Personally, I believe that what God has made clean no man should make unclean (somewhere in Acts... I need to brush up on my memory verses) BUT that's my belief, not yours. We are both trying to do what is right in the eyes of God and I'm not to tell you that I'm right about it and you're not, but I will say why I believe what I do and let you be guided by scripture. (Can I ask where you get your beliefs from? I'd rather be corrected if I need to be.)
If you are lied to then as far as I'm concerned, it's not your problem - the person who lied will have to answer to God on two counts; lying and going against God's word. You do the best you can to the best of your abilities and God can't blame you for someone else lying to you.
Good for you for sticking to your guns and I agree, if you can't trust someone then they shouldn't babysit.
(BTW, Maz, I agree Christening shawls are nice to have for a christening, but why not knit a lovely shawl for another reason: christening shawls aren't scriptural, gorgeousest baby in the world shawls aren't non-scriptural.)
I hate the rolling of the eyes!! How rude!! I agree, why can't everyone just leave everyone alone to do their own thing!
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It can be so frustrating.
So they're going to think I'm a weirdo too then.
that's what it's like, like you've gone and joined some weird cult!! I feel like you too, I just don't discuss things with them anymore.
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