SJ, it is very challenging isn't it! My DH was brought up muslim and I was brought up catholic. His family are not around so I don't haev to deal with them but my family are around and mum and dad are very catholic. He does not observe all muslim things but he does not eat pork products and does not want dd to either. He does not tell me what to eat but I don't have pork products in the house.
My mum is absolutley lovely and would love to take dd to church but will not out of respect for DH's views. But she does not seem to care about feeding dd ham sandwiches and putting bacon in pumpkin soup and feeding taht to both DD and DH. It sort of makes me laugh now as it does not matter how many times I say it she just can't understand it.
We did not have any ceremonies for DD as I jsut thougth it would cause too many issues. I feel like I should try to do more to teach her about our faiths so she can make an informed decision when she is older.