Words are inadequate to express the deep sorrow I truly feel that you and your wife have lost your precious daughter. It's a wound that is felt deep in your chest and takes it's time repairing, if at all. From what I have been told by others who have suffered similar losses decades ago, it never heals completely. I am sorry you are having to deal with this tragic event.
I lost my daughter 9 months ago and still feel the pain of her abscence in our family. It is something I am trying to absorb into my life as I feel it has changed me as a person.
How do you cope? One day at a time. Find a good counsellor, talk about her with your wife and anyone who'll listen, allow yourselves to cry and cry and cry for however long it takes, get to understand the stages of grief (one step forward, two steps backward), give each other the space and time you both need to grieve as individuals, journal your feelings, write her a letter, create an album for her, plant a tree...the best advice my counsellor gave me was to cry whenever I felt like crying. Don't stop yourself from doing this.
I hope both you and your wife visit again. We'd love to know your daughter's name and hear every raw emotion you are feeling.
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