i haven't been in exactly your situation, so i can't say i know how i'd react, but even to me, who's losses have been very early - well, i find those kind of "stories" most insensitive - particularly from family who KNOW what you've been through! no matter what turns your life has taken since the loss of your precious angels, they will ALWAYS be in your heart - you can't just forget about them and move on with life like it never happened - you find a way to go on and live, but it's always there.

for me, i read stories about babies who've survived against the odds, and i find it amazing, heart warming - and yet at the same time, heart breaking that these babies have made it when mine haven't - but that is a CHOICE that i make to read those stories - i read them in my time, my space - and i let myself feel everything - i would be extremely annoyed if it was forced upon me so insensitively. i don't think you're being over sensitive at all - i think your FIL just doesn't have a clue of the impact he's having with these comments

in your case, i would be sitting DH down and saying "you need to talk to them - i will NEVER be completely over Thomas and the pain of his loss - they need to remember to be sensitive - or to just shut up".

i hope you can find some peace with this - huge hugs hun

BG