Loving my two boys but only holding one

[briggsy's girl]

Lynn - Mel has said pretty much everything i was thinking - and so beautifully at that!

anyone that thinks Ethan has replaced Cooper and that you should be grateful and just get in with life - well, they're heartless and don't have a clue of what you've been through. i haven't been there, and can only imagine how you're feeling - but i would never expect you to feel less of the love and emotion you have for Cooper now that Ethan is here - they're individuals and your love for each of them is unique and precious.

don't be angry with yourself for being human! every new mum is tired and emotional, and wants for their baby to be settled and happy - and hearing them cry is heart wrenching (and frustrating) - that doesn't change because you've wanted every day to have heard Coopers cries. your journey to holding Ethan in your arms has been long and traumatic - but he's still a newborn baby and you have the same trials as any new mum! of course you are happy to have Ethan at home with you - but that doesn't mean you're not allowed to feel the same frustrations as any other new mum! people have to accept and embrace that. you will never forget Cooper. you will never love him, or grieve his loss, any less simply because you have Ethan. you are his mummy and people (whoever they may be) need to accept and support that.

i wish i could offer you a way to put your heart at peace, but i don't have the power to do that - only time, and your own healing, will do that for you - and it WILL take time. my heart goes out to you hunny

:hugs:

BG

[Rowie]

Oh Lynn, I am so sorry you are having such a difficult emotional time at the moment. Remember your emotions are high at the moment, your hormones are racing and you are sleep deprived.
You did not have Ethan to replace Cooper, Cooper is your son too. You love him just as much as Ethan so please don't be too hard on yourself. You will always miss Cooper and I think you are always going to have moments where you see Cooper in Ethan and miss him more. It's not about getting on with life, it is about dealing with the cards we have been dealt and coping as best we can.
You are an amazing woman, admired by many here for the way you are coping and have coped over the last 2 and a half years. You are a wonderful mother who is doing the best that she can in a very difficult situation.
You are a true inspiration to me and I thank you for being here to help me through my tough times and to the many others that hear you.
take care of you and I am always here if you need me.