Dear Tildy, I am so very very sorry for the loss of your little baby.
I wish I could be there to hold your hand and give you lots of hugs, as i can only imagine that you will be needing them.
Allow yourself to grieve for the bub. Are there any support groups that you may be able to attend for families that have experienced late loss in your area? Sometimes finding solidarity with others that have had similar experiences can help in the healing process by knowing that you are not alone and that there are others experiencing similar emotions to your own.
I lost our little angel very early on, at 8 weeks, and because there was nothing 'tangible' to remember him (i had a feeling it was a boy), i bought a keepsake to remember and acknowledge his existence. i also put in there photos of all of us and a letter for him. I keep it in a box and anytime i go in and have a look.
I really hope that you get all the cuddles you need. Here on belly belly there is fantastic support and solidarity for all of us mummas...
oh my god you poor, poor girl. I am in tears for you and your husband and baby. What a shocking and heartbreaking ordeal you have been through. The way that nurse treated you and your baby was horrendous and you have every right in the world to be angry and hurt. It is no wonder you have been having nightmares. That nurse deserves to be sacked in my opinion.
I agree that a support group would be a great idea...just to have people hear your story and give you some support during this terrible time...here in WA I called SIDS, they really helped me get through some bleak and lonely times....a keepsake box was also helpful for me.
i know there are no words to take away your pain and heartache but there are many ladies here who have been through late loss and gone on to have successful pg's.
Tildy....I'm so sorry to hear what you & your hubby had to go through, I'm sorry that you've lost your little bub. I'm just stunned reading about what the medical team had put you through specially at the time where you needed a lot of support. I'm happy to read that you've taken this matter further with the medical board etc. I wish you all the luck for TTC again. Hope you have a little healthy bub in your arms soon
Benjamin Liam Ceangailte Paulsson was born at 18:14 on April 17 after a VERY easily induced labor. My water was broken at 10:30 am, at which point contractions immediately came at a rate of 4 every 10 minutes with very little pain relief in between. By 15:30 I was told that I was already 10 cm open and could clearly feel the pushing stage beginning. By 17:30 they said Benny's heart rate was showing distress and I was thereafter tortured by an extra midwife putting all her weight on the top of my stomach as I pushed -- which you can imagine I did with all my might after hearing "danger!" By 18:14 they snipped me a bit to get him out.
They laid him there on the bed at my feet, and I just sat and hyper-ventilated, wide-eyed, staring in shock -- I was so focused on "God, let this end soon!" that I had totally forgotten why we were there and HOW it would end! We've been so focused on getting through the pregnancy successfully that every second since he came out has been surreal and a little hard to digest, haha! Even if the results of almost 3 hours of pushing are stitches, super hemmoroids, a catheter I get to schlep home with me, and amazing training pain from head to toe, I'm completely in awe-struck love.
Thank you all for the comfort and hugs. I can see here that there are several of you who have had late losses but then had a baby fairly soon afterward, and I know there are a couple in the TTC thread who are about halfway through a pregnancy after a late loss. It makes me feel more hope, that it's not just bull**** the doctors are throwing at me when they say it was a "fluke" and that I should believe everything will go OK next time.
I am so sorry for your loss
I had tears while reading your story.The treatment you received at the hospital is despicable.No one should ever have to go through something like that.
I wish you all the best for the future.
Thanks, Laura. Now I'm in the 8th week of a new pregnancy and have already been to the emergency clinic a couple times. The treatment I received has been much better. The two nurses that met me last week introduced themselves and looked at me and talked to me, told me exactly why they were taking blood, came back to update me on how long I might have to wait... so different. I hope that nurse from last time has been moved to floor mopping duty or something!
Tildy, congratulations on your new pregnancy! I hope & pray that in 8 months from now we'll be hearing about your beautiful new arrival who won't be able to totally erase the pain of losing your tiny angel, but can help you write a new future.
I am absolutely HORRIFIED at your story that led up to the loss of your angel. So pleased to hear you are getting much better treatment this time around. Couldn't help but *LOL* at your suggestion that you hope the 1st horrible nurse is now mopping the floors!
im sitting here with my mouth wide open at what has happened to you and how you have been treated. I am so gobsmacked that nurses treated you like that and especially the nurse who flushed the toilet WTF....... im so sorry for your loss and i am praying your new little baby inside is kepts safe and well and you have a healthy/ complication free pregnancy and are very wel taken care of.
Thank you for sharing your story and i hope it has helped you somewhat
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