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thread: Feel like a bad mother!!

  1. #19
    Registered User

    Sep 2006
    On Channel Zzzzzzz
    1,037

    !!!!

    Omg!! I remember!! So at the risk of repeating what has been said, I really do agree with everything!! Especially..........

    a) Allocate strict visiting hours and even then, not every day.

    b) Then when visitors do arrive, make them earn their cuddle with bubs
    ( I did it to my own mum and sister once, hehe! Just a reminder of who actually pushed this child out into the world in the past couple of months!! )
    ....including getting them to make you a cuppa, not you wait on them!!

    c) get those you trust to take your bubby out for a walk/drive (even if little one cries the whole time.......they only hear it for a couple of hours then they get to go home!)

    d) be as selfish as you need to be lovey......milk it if you have to, haha!! Seriously, at the point you are in your current new journey with bubs, you should only have to think about you and bubs and your partner. No one else matters right now so really relax into a 'tunnel vision' mode! IT really is only for a short season in the grand scheme of things but when you are in the thick of it, it can seem like an eternity.....so one moment at a time! xx

    My biggest thought though is to make sure you stay in contact with the right people, ie pead, GP, midwife etc, even if you feel like you are repeating yourself or going around the mulberry bush......go around it 1000 times if you have to, thats what they are there for. Keep chatting to your lovely partner and BB and those I mentioned above coz we're all here to help you through this time..................it can really do your head in!!

    Thinking of you love and be encouraged that you are so far from being a bad mum!! The fact that you care so much to vent and share and get help makes you the greatest mummy ever!! You love your munchkin so much and we can all tell that!

    Goodness me.............my girls recently had colds so I had hardly any sleep yet more than what you are getting and I was still a grumpy, snappy, cross mummy so you're doing great sweety!!!

    Thinking of you! xx

  2. #20
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Sydney NSW
    4,837

    Honey you are a normal mother!! I think I have said that at one point to all of my babies, sleep deprivation is a form of torture you know.
    I just asked DD aged 16 if she remembers me telling her to shut up as a tiny baby and she said no!! I said has it ruined your life?? She said she didn't think so LOL

  3. #21
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    Over the rainbow
    1,509

    Hun, you are not a bad mommy. Bad mommies just does not care wheter her bubba cries.

    Just to give you my "normal" experiance

    I was walking around the kitchen table, 3am in the morning. It was HOT. I was in just my panties. In my arms were my one and a half month old "little angel" screaching her pretty little lungs out for the past four hours. I have not had any sleep in God only knows when. She did not want my breast. I was walk/dancing trying to get into a rythym that she would like so that she MIGHT go to sleep. And I thought ... what would happen if ... I droped her ... hard .... very hard .......

    I felt so guilty half a sec after thinking that, that I went into the bedroom, placed her in my bed and just stepped back a while. I sat on the edge of the bed for a while, DH were patting her bottom and she dosed off. I still feel silly for thinking something like that, but I was not myself at that stage.

    Get some sleep. Those ppl coming for visits, tell then you need a break and let them cuddle bubba for a while.

    Goodluck, babe. Chin up. It does get better ... eventually!!

  4. #22
    Registered User
    Add Dragonbub on Facebook

    Feb 2006
    Perth WA
    900

    Ditto to what everyone else has said. I used to cry in the car with Caden - it didn't shut him up but it felt strangely relieving! It is so normal hun, especially with no sleep, constant feeding and a totally unravelled life. Seriously, like everyone has said, get some rest. It is so important you look after yourself FIRST. You are an excellent mum, otherwise you wouldnt care.

    Hugs to you babe, take care.

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