Newborn - only sleeping on me...

[LuluHB]

Sorry - just had to post again. Please please please ignore those books. I read them all before my DD was born too and worried I was the worst mother in the world because my baby wasn't doing what the books said she should be doing. Unfortunately our babies can't read so we have to play by their rules, not the books!!

Willow is right - it does get so much easier. The first few weeks of having a baby can be the most frustrating, depressing and disappointing - I felt I was doing everything wrong and on more than one occasion wondered how my baby would survive my incompetence. BUT in no time at all, just a couple of months, you will find that your own intuition is what you need to listen to. Nobody knows your baby like you do so trust your instincts. They are all different so just because one baby is doing one thing, it doesn't make your baby "wrong" by doing something completely different. Hang in there, and in no time you too will feel like one of those women where everything comes naturally and easily.

[KatieRabbit]

I'm posting again too! Like Willow, i8t all sounds too familiar. I thought I had been conned big time- I was supposed to feel like a mother yet I was stressed, tired, sure I had a baby with something wrong (cos she wouldn't sleep!), breastfeeding was difficult and I actually think I was in shock at the changes in my life that was out of control. But take heart Natalie. Those feelings have well gone and DD is only 4 months old. Still adapting to life with DD at home after years of study and professional fulltime work. But worth every minute. Forget the books- no-one's baby follows them. They are often out of touch with reality. And the feelings of being overwhelmed and stuck are so so normal. I wish people spoke out more about how hard it is with a baby. I have friends with babies who still can't say "It's very hard" or "I can't cope", and I think what is so wrong with admitting it is hard?? It is like a conspiracy not to let pregnant women know! Hang in there. We are here for you. PS Why don't you put your son in the cot/hammock/floor etc and jump in the shower, even if he is awake? It's hard at first but have a 2 minute shower to feel better and he will be fine in a safe place awake.

[sneakysparkle]

Hey Natalie,
I just wanted to totally agree with what has already been said - IGNORE THE BOOKS! Breastmilk is designed to help babies sleep! And babies need their mummy. I always fed my DD to sleep - day and night, and she would sleep on me/next to me for day sleeps. I too had problems going to the toilet/having a shower, but would just put her next to me in her rocker
I had people saying "you're making a rod for your own back" etc etc but I ignored them because it was working! I'm so glad I just did what felt right because she is a very relaxed and happy 14mth old now. I fed her to sleep till I weaned her a month ago, and since then she has been old enough (and I believe secure enough) to go to sleep on her own - without crying.
Please be encouraged that you are doing the right thing
Hang in there darl, and try to enjoy this special time.

[Lulu]

Oh yeah, prop him on the floor and have a shower if worst comes to worst.

Some days I gave in, had a quick shower, made my bed, put on fresh jarmies and sat in bed with him all day. Just feed and doze, stare out the window. Looking back those days were the ones I remember as so calm and snuggly. It's ok to do that you know.

If you get visitors handpass the baby, jump in the shower and get them to help fold your washing. Visitors to my house have to work in the early days!

[Kazmar]

What ever works and gets u and ur baby boy 2 sleep.
I used 2 do the same with Annabelle and it didn't do any harm she now puts herself 2 sleep. I mean she goes trough stages but only when shes teething or going through seperation anxity.
When she was a newborn she would always fall asleep at the breast, now she is awake after a feed and i put her in bed bright eyed or drowsey and she finds her way back 2 dream land
If ur household is getting sleep then ur doing the 'right' thing
This stage doesn't last long so enjoy every day cuddled up in bed and all day pj days Annabelle and i still have them, there my fave days!

[nataliew]

thank you, thank you, thank you.
Bubs slept with us last night and I actually feel semi sane today! It's hard though - I feel guilty, like I've done the wrong thing (and I wouldn't tell anyone that I let him sleep in our bed) funny how it's ingrained in me that it's not the 'right' thing to do...
All of your posts have made me not feel so alone in this. Why does nobody say 'yeah it's hard, so hard'..?
I miss work, I miss alone time with hubby, I miss popping to the shops to get stuff for dinner, I even miss making dinner!
But its not forever and I need to give into it for a while - easier said than done but I'm making that my mantra for now.

[Lulu]

Nat as long as your and DP aren't drunk or stoned it's fine to sleep with bubs. But if you don't want to tell people and spare yourself a lecture - that's fine too!

I'm a long time co sleeper, it sorts ANY baby out tee hee!

And to pinch a comment from another thread ....your baby must like you or something!!! Mmmmmm mummmy!