What am i missing?

[onthefly]

Trust me, it will pass, but you need to make things as easy as possible on yourself in the mean time.
A cleaner could stay out of private areas and just do the kitchen, etc... would that be a workable compromise? Has your DH ever been left with the kids to fend for himself? He really seems to have unrealistic expectations.
I found the same thing as Arcadia when introducing solids, winding it back a bit helped.
I really hope things improve for you - I truly know how hard it is when you're not getting any rest and nothign seems to work

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

Trust me, it will pass, but you need to make things as easy as possible on yourself in the mean time.
A cleaner could stay out of private areas and just do the kitchen, etc... would that be a workable compromise? Has your DH ever been left with the kids to fend for himself? He really seems to have unrealistic expectations.
I found the same thing as Arcadia when introducing solids, winding it back a bit helped.
I really hope things improve for you - I truly know how hard it is when you're not getting any rest and nothign seems to work

At the moment i am not even sure we could afford a cleaner ontop of my weird obsession with not leaving people alone in my house...

DP has had DD1 on his own when i took DD2 to QLD with me for a wedding and he is more than capable with her (although nothing around the hyouse got done - his excuse it was his only weekend off in 6mths), i would leave DD2 with him but she doesn't settle well and often needs the boob and she wont take EBM even from him.
He had DD1 for 6 nights when she was younger due to a stuff up with my gall bladder removal, he handled that quite well although she had only JUST taken the bottle through NEED and allowing her to scream until hungry, it was very hard for him to go through and i don't want to stuff DD2 around while i can still BF 100%.
I was quite angry my supply dried up due to medical issues with DD1 so don't want to jeopardise it this time.

I'm sorry i keep coming up with brick walls, i have an excuse for everything today i have the attitude i just don't care, both my girls seem to be sick now, DD1 had the most horrible running nose and just fell asleep watching ICE AGE.. she normally has 1 sleep a day and it's not until 1 or after.. so i KNOW she's not well.. argh.
DP an deal with the house being a mess, although he will say DD1 sleeping means i should have done more.. well toooo bad!

[Arcadia]

I wish I lived closer so I could give you a hand. You sound very isolated.

You need to rest in the day and not worry about housework.. Take care of yourself. You don't want to end up sick from exhaustion...I've been there and it's awful.

Eta: your poor dd. Hope she gets better soon. If she's unwell it's likely dd2 is getting it. My dd was awake every 30 mins for 2 nights when sick last week. Hang in there hun

[onthefly]

Oh bugger, that's just what you need. Well if they're sleeping I hope you get some rest too
I understand the brick walls - that's what happens when you're at the end of your rope. And I too have made myself sick by not taking time out when I needed to - It seems impossible at the time, I know, but there is always a way.

[helle]

do you think it could just be detachment anxiety? or whatever it's called... she wants you and ONLY you!
J is starting to do that now. He'll scream merry hell if I walk out of a room, even if DH is holding him (and when I walk back in he cracks a smile - DH is going to get a complex soon) if he's just been fed changed and burped. He's also chucking the ****s if he drops a toy he's been playing with... fun!

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

Thanks so much everyone.. DD1 is officially sick, runny nose, sooky, wanting mummy, we have watched 4 DVD's today and she finally fell asleep on me, her temp was 38 earlier to have tried some panadol and some icy pole, can tell she's not well she isn't eating much either.

BUT on a good note i have done absolutely NOTHING today, done the dishes and 2 loads of washing and thats it BUT the best part... ZARA HAS HAD 2 DECENT SLEEPS... she is asleep now and has been for close to 2hrs i'm not sure if it was because she ate a decent amount of rice cereal this morning, becuase i have been giving her infacol every 2nd feed.. i have no idea but am hoping it continues *touch wood*
She was still a bit grumpy but tonight will be the test, she is normally feral around our dinner time so am thinking i might give her a feed when she wakes then see if she wants a tiny bit of rice cereal again for dinner (need to do some more veg food shopping for baby friendly BLS)

Thanks so so much for everything, i doubt she will be back to 100% straught away but i can hope.