When DD1 was born my folks were living 2 hours away, but Mum still drove up at least once per week to visit us but never stayed overnight. I would never let anyone clean my house, do my washing etc, but Mum was great in settling DD1, changing nappies, making lunch etc.

With DD2, born 12 months after DD1, my Mum literally saved my life. They moved house so they were closer to us. DD2 was pretty sick for months after birth and spent most of her little life screaming. Again, Mum did the nappy changes, lunch, coffees etc as well as endlessly walking the floors trying to settle DD2 - all while entertaining DD1. She also realised I was suffering from very severe PND and simply stepped in. She came to me three days per week and I went to her one day per week. While Mum didn't wash, cook, clean etc simply having her there supporting me was priceless.

My ILs on the other hand couldn't have been more useless . . .