i've only been around the family once (yesterday) - so a lot of what i know, i know due to my friend telling me. from my own observations yesterday though, they just didn't want to bother. they had their older two being responsible for the younger ones (the youngest is probably 15-18 months and wasn't supervised by the parents at all while outside). i don't think he has been taught boundaries. i suspect there is a very big degree of attention seeking behaviour. yes i understand that mum is pregnant and may be feeling tired. i understand that mum and dad have some pretty serious marital issues. i don't understand how they can expect their older kids to parent the younger ones and not have the younger ones turn into painful people with no understanding of right or wrong. i dont understand leaving a 10 year old responsible for a toddler. i don't understand leaving a child they KNOW is nasty in a back yard with kids he will target. he did all he could to upset the toddler, he upset L, he upset DD. he HATED that L and DD were playing happily together and basically ignoring him. i guess that may be why he targeted DD

there is a big difference between letting kids play without being smothered, and totally ignoring them. i try to take a step back (watching out a window or just sitting on the deck watching) i dont' ignore (they were inside, blinds down, watching the footy. if it weren't for DH and myself, and my friend popping in and out, there would have been zero supervision for pretty much the entire game)

sigh - i feel like i'm judging their parenting, because it's very different to my own - but i can't seem to help it. when their "parenting" puts my kid at risk, it's a problem for me