It's hard to refuse the pressure of the hospital staff, but you can do it if you remember that YOU are in charge, not them. Make sure your partner is really clued in on the birth plan you have and what the staff are likely to do.

One way to get a good birth is to hire a doula. If you can't afford one, a college of doulas may provide you with a free student doula to attend your birth and support you. Women who birth with doulas have much better outcomes