Oh thank you all for understanding

Her parting remark last night when my DH tapped my belly and told the bub to get out was "you need to get a stretch and sweep done" - I just looked at her and said "no, I don't know where Mother Nature provides those and I'm certainly not letting you near me"

My DH and I explained to her earlier in the day that while we are grateful she is there to look after my son she is not here in the capacity of a midwife and I very bluntly told her that her philosophies on giving birth were clearly different from mine and since i wasn't going to be pressured into her suggestions for the sake of harmony it'd be better if she just didn't suggest them.

Seems it fell on deaf ears when she suggested the S&S

She won't be there for the birth - we're likely to go to the BC because my little guy wouldn't do well seeing me in pain - but more than that, she was there at my son's birth, speaks to this day how mismanaged it was, but never ONCE made an effort on the day to step in and either speak to my DH to refuse certain things etc - so I don't think she deserves a second opportunity to bag the birth I actually want.....I can just see it now - she'll whinge about it being a water birth etc - when she found out it was a BC birth the first thing to come out of her mouth was "they are very hands off midwives, you will tear, a water birth is dangerous if the baby swallows water" I just said to her "for an educated woman you have a serious deficit in birthing knowledge"