Yes unfortunately the way things are these days that if you want something specific, you have to ask or fight for it, which is not something you want to do in labour hence the need for good birth support people. I see dad's reduced to tears all the time, because it is so hard sometimes to understand and be able to know what to do and say for their partner. Like I always say to everyone, it's up to you to inform yourself and get that birth you want - it's often not going to be served on a plate for you and often it's the strong who survive!!! So start with a carer you trust and acknowledges and supports your birth intentions (get them to sign it!), a place of birth which has good birth philosophies, GREAT pre-natal education - forget the hospital, it's only going to be based around their need for management, and great support. I am not sure of some pre-natal education in Adelaide, will see what I can find out.
For birth videos, if you just want to see births, there is a huge collection on the ACE Graphics website, Capers website etc but if you mean something else let me know. I think just seeing lots of homebirth/waterbirth DVD's are great as it gives you all that power and confidence that it can be done without interventions and it can be done well when things are undisturbed.
Consider having a Doula / Birth Attendant. After every birth I have been to, they all say to me that they couldn't have done it without me. And while I always reply, 'Hey, you were the star of the show - it was all you,' it just goes to show you how much that extra support has meant and been helpful - plus you get the benefits of the things a Doula brings including all that lowered rates of interventions and the little things that she can remind the doctors - e.g. 'Wait - she's asked that you wait before cutting the cord,' when mum and dad are so exhausted and overwhelmed with emotion holding their baby, and they just don't notice what else is going on. I also love taking those 'right-after-birth' photos that dad can't take because he is getting to know his new baby
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