WDYT of this, im a bit horrified...

[STARRYSKY]

I respect your opinion misty, thanks for that, but I see it as if one doesnt take the plunge and question peoples beliefs and ideas then where does it lead us? blindly foloowing what some "professional" says...I do understand what youre getting at, I am doing my best to not come across as judgemental to either of them (my bro and SIL) Iknow how scary it is, I had the same thing at 36 wks (measuring 42 wks) but there wasnt the worry about it (due probably to my advanced stage of pgncy) but I was still very scared and can only imagine what it would be like to be told at 24wks that your baby could be delivered any day...
I do have the best intentions and I wouldnt dream of "telling" her what she should/nt do, I was just trying to understand why the baby was being delivered so early, Beema has thankfully cleared this up for me (thanks hun!) I just didnt think it sounded right as far as I knew everything was hunky dory now and the baby was fine etc..
I love that I have BB to come too to vent/ask these questions, so I can get a good look at how I feel written in front of my face and see how others feel and what they have to say.
Thanks everyone for your replies. xx

[slyder]

I respect your opinion misty, thanks for that, but I see it as if one doesnt take the plunge and question peoples beliefs and ideas then where does it lead us? blindly foloowing what some "professional" says...I do understand what youre getting at, I am doing my best to not come across as judgemental to either of them (my bro and SIL) Iknow how scary it is, I had the same thing at 36 wks (measuring 42 wks) but there wasnt the worry about it (due probably to my advanced stage of pgncy) but I was still very scared and can only imagine what it would be like to be told at 24wks that your baby could be delivered any day...
I do have the best intentions and I wouldnt dream of "telling" her what she should/nt do, I was just trying to understand why the baby was being delivered so early, Beema has thankfully cleared this up for me (thanks hun!) I just didnt think it sounded right as far as I knew everything was hunky dory now and the baby was fine etc..
I love that I have BB to come too to vent/ask these questions, so I can get a good look at how I feel written in front of my face and see how others feel and what they have to say.
Thanks everyone for your replies. xx

I second everything Misty said and she said it much more tactfully than I would. I believe you're well out of order in your inferences about their ob when you know nothing about him/her, and also in regard to your inferences about their lack of knowledge/education. Just because they have a different approach does not necessarily make them ill informed or in need of your guidance.

She clearly is experiencing worrying complications with this pregnancy, and I know if she was my wife, I'd be absolutely going to town if someone started down the road you've taken and the manner in which you've done it.

I mean no offence, I'm just offering my opinion. I think it's good that you are evaluating your own opinions against your approach. It's their life, let them live it.

[STARRYSKY]

slyder-

[Mummato2]

I agree with Misty and Slyder.

My first birth was an OB led birth and with all due respect, I OPTED for an induction complete with every bit of intervention you could throw at me, including drugs......why? because at the time I had a medical issue and was under the advice to induce....was it the best option? in hindsight, probably not, but I can tell you now that I had a well meaning CLOSE friend who I deemed a "natural birth bully" criticize every piece of my plan because SHE felt it was wrong.......I wonder how she would have felt if I challenged my Dr and went against advice then my baby died.......

I don't say this to be harsh, and I am not deeming you a natural birth bully, but in labour and birth there are 3 kinds of people (generally).....the ones that are well informed of all options and CHOOSE to have their birth medically managed for various reasons, the ones that are well informed of all options and CHOOSE to have their births unfold as nature would intend it and the ones that have no freaking idea but go with whatever they're told without challenge.

At the end of the day birth is such a personal thing, who has the right to tell someone their choices are wrong because THEY feel it isn't the decision THEY would make?

It's kinda like breastfeeding I guess. I didn't BF my son and am still going strong with my DD. My best friend stopped at 3 months because she felt her baby got too old for it......who am I to judge?

I wish your SIL all the luck she deserves with the birth of precious Isaac......and you know what? You are a doll for being so concerned but be a doting Aunty once Isaac is here and try not to go hard at your SIL

[Persephone1]

I think it's natural for you to be concerned about whether your brother and SIL are making informed decisions rather than just doing what the Ob tells them to do without questioning it. And I think it's normal to be horrified if you think they are making uninformed decisions. I think it's a whole other thing to question and judge them for those decisions, to their faces at least.

I'm constantly saddened when I hear stories like this one, where I consider uninformed decisions are being made and women (and their partners) are subjecting themselves and their babies to interventions without knowing the full facts. My own SIL had a c-section because her baby was "too big" to be birthed vaginally - the baby was only 3.1kg in the end (smaller than my baby!), but her Ob "wouldn't let her go past 38 weeks" because he considered her baby was too big. Now, I was sad for my SIL and her baby that she made that decision, which I considered was an uninformed one, but I didn't tell her that. I figured it wasn't my place to educate her, and who am I to judge? (Obviously I am judging her, but not to her face! ).

I suppose what I'm saying is that I understand where you're coming from, and I think I would feel the same way if I were in the same situation. But I probably would bite my tongue - because I know what it's like to have people express their opinions about my decisions, even when it's none of their business.

Wishing little Isaac a safe arrival.

[STARRYSKY]

okay , I value all your input and I understand this is a forum and everyone is entitled to their opinion, I put this out there, therefore I need to wear it, but can I just make it clear that

1, The answer to my original question was answered by Beema, being that yes, delivery at 37 weeks is a common scenario in this type of situation.
2, I probably should have put most of that OP in the venting/punching bag forum, it is what it is, a vent, its how I FEEL,
3, I came back to this thread when I saw that slyder had posted, assuming it was all over and done with, to react quite strongly to his words, I walked away from my computer shaking and ended up having a good cry, I was VERY ****ed off but made myself calm down and actually think about WHY, before I came back to post.
4, Nothing I have said to my SIL has been in any way shape or form, rude, obnoxious or even pushy, it was all said in friendly conversation,I have bitten my tongue in regard to this situation and their whole pregnancy, as I know its not my place to say anything, I come to BB and get it all out here. I feel as if some of you have just jumped to conclusions about how I have treated her and my brother. THAT is what saddens me, and angers me, but you know what, I probably havent made my OP very clear in that respect and on a forum it is all to easy to jump on your high horse (as I have done) and jump to conclusions as you dont know the full story, only what I have written.
I will leave it at that.
Again thankyou for your replies. xx

[slyder]

3, I came back to this thread when I saw that slyder had posted, assuming it was all over and done with, to react quite strongly to his words, I walked away from my computer shaking and ended up having a good cry, I was VERY ****ed off but made myself calm down and actually think about WHY, before I came back to post.

Crikey. I have a gift I think. I don't get why this happens. I know I don't wrap my posts up in :hugs: and "huns" and dilly dally around the point and whatever, but I'm just one opinion in a community of many thousands. It's the Internet, if you don't like my opinion (which you invited) just call me a knob and move on. I'm cool with that. I can't stand the thought of making a woman cry because of something I said in an open and honest fashion without any malice or ill will. I can't deal with that. Sometimes I nearly walk away from this place all together because I just can't comprehend the sensitivities and the blow ups and the fact that so many strident views are passable here, but a differing opinion (expressed without fluff) is so intensely offensive. Anyway, Slyder sook ends here.

I feel as if some of you have just jumped to conclusions about how I have treated her and my brother. THAT is what saddens me, and angers me, but you know what, I probably havent made my OP very clear in that respect and on a forum it is all to easy to jump on your high horse (as I have done) and jump to conclusions as you dont know the full story, only what I have written.

No high horse here, not even a medium sized one; just working with what I was given.

Anyway, God, it's just my opinion and you specifically asked people what they thought so I said...

Peace out.