I was so surprised as the midwife the night before said that I’d more than likely need a second or possibly third tablet. I agreed to her breaking my waters but I didn’t like the look of the plastic hook going inside me though. I’m not sure what happened after that but I think I imagined that my waters would trickle out and I can’t remember that happening. I can’t actually remember what happened between 11 AM – 2 PM but I can remember repeating “oo my back” about 10000000 times and I can remember having some more paracetamol, codeine and diclofenac which was stupid for pain relief. The midwife asked me if I’d like pethadine and as the pain was so bad, I agreed and had that. To be honest, the pethadine didn’t have any effect on me whatsoever and didn’t dull the pain at all in the slightest. I was still constantly feeling sick and couldn’t bear the thought of eating anything so I didn’t have anything so she gave me an anti-sickness jab too which made my sickness worse.

The midwife asked me to change into one of those foul, unflattering hospital gowns (which strangled me – I hate things around my neck). At 2 PM the midwife led me and Paul to the delivery room. The midwife was on my left and Paul on my right and they had their arms under my arms and had to in a way carry me in there because I was in too much pain to walk on my own. I got on the bed and remember being hooked up to some sort of monitor as I remember there were wired everywhere and I caught one with my foot – I remember that as it was the midwife who told me.

I was asked by the midwife if I’d like to try gas and air so I thought I’d give it a go as I had nothing to lose. As soon as the midwife told me how to use it, I wasn’t ever off it. It was weird getting the hang of using it but it soon became second nature. The mouth piece kept somehow coming away from the pipe. After about the first 3 inhalations, I felt out of it, as high as a kite and as if I’d been up Ashbourne on an all night bender. It reminded me of the feelings I used to get when I was drunk (which I don’t really remember much as I haven’t drank for 15 months) and I loved it